Sam Morril - Dating Troubles

A Good Day to Direct Hard Season 2, Ep 8 10/24/2014 Views: 5,032

A messy apartment will never stop Sam Morril from trying to have a one-night stand. (1:15)

WITH THIS GIRL FROM A BARTHE OTHER NIGHT.

AND SHE WAS LIKE,"I'D INVITE YOU OVER,

BUT MY PLACEIS KIND OF A MESS."

LIKE THAT'S A DETERRENTAT 3:30 IN THE MORNING.

LIKE I'M GONNAWALK INTO HER APARTMENT

AND BE LIKE,"ABSOLUTELY NOT.

"YOU FOLD THESE SHEETS,WE COULD TALK, BUT...

WITHOUT A DUVET COVER,IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN."

I WAS LIKE, "OF COURSEYOUR PLACE IS A MESS.

"IF YOU'RE WILLINGTO HAVE SEX WITH ME,

I'M GONNA ASSUME YOUR WHOLE LIFEIS IN SHAMBLES."

MY EX-GIRLFRIEND WAS A HOARDER.I USED TO DATE A HOARDER.

AND SHE BROKE UP WITH ME.

THAT STINGS EXTRA HARD.

I'M, LIKE, THE ONE THINGSHE CAN GET RID OF.

WE WERE IN BED ONE NIGHT.

SHE WAS LIKE,"WHAT'S YOUR FANTASY?

I'M GONNA GIVE YOUYOUR FANTASY."

I WAS LIKE, "MY FANTASY.

"I WANT YOU TO DRESSLIKE A NURSE,

"AND THEN I WANT YOU TO TELL ME

"THAT I HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE.

THEN, IF YOU COULD WAIVEMY COPAY, THAT WOULD BE HOT."

I WAS WITH A GIRLTHE OTHER NIGHT.

WE WERE GOING AT IT.

SEX.

YOU KNOW WHAT SHE SAID TO MEWHILE HAVING SEX?

SHE WAS LIKE,"I WANT YOU TO [bleep] ME

LIKE YOU'RE NEVER GONNASEE ME AGAIN."

I WAS LIKE, "I WAS."