Elvira Kurt - Mother

  • Season 2, Ep 2
  • 05/28/1999
  • Views: 7,099

Elvira is a comedian and a lesbian -- both at the same time. (3:12)

IF SHE JUST SOUGHT OUTA SUPPORT GROUP.

IF SHE JOINED P-FLAG,THAT WONDERFUL SUPPORT GROUP--

PARENTS AND FRIENDSOF LESBIANS AND GAYS--

BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE IF SHE DID,SHE WOULDN'T BE ISOLATED

YOU KNOW, IF SHE WEREAMONG HER OWN KIND.

( laughter )

AND THEN I THINK ABOUT ITREALISTICALLY.

CAN YOU SEE MY MOMAT A P-FLAG MEETING?

"HI. MY NAME IS IRENE.I VISH I VAS DEAD."

( laughter )

SHE'D BE NO HELPON THE CRISIS LINE.

"GIVE UP.IT'S ONLY GOING TO GET VORSE."

( laughter )

AND ME, SOMETIMES I JUSTADMIRE HER STAMINA, YOU KNOW?

LAST YEAR I WAS SO EXCITED.

I WAS TALKING ABOUTGAY PRIDE DAY IN SAN FRANCISCO--

BIGGEST ONE EVER--700,000 PEOPLE.

I'M LIKE, "MOMMY,CAN YOU IMAGINE 700,000 PEOPLE

AND WE ALL HAVEONE THING IN COMMON?"

SHE SAYS, "YEAH.A MOTHER WHO IS MISERABLE."

( laughter and applause )

ALTHOUGH, MY FAVORITE IS ALWAYSTHE CLASS GUILT TRIP.

YOU PROBABLYHAVE HEARD IT YOURSELVES.

PLEASE FEEL FREE TO JOIN IN--YOU KNOW THE ONE.

"SO THAT'S THE VAYIT'S GOING TO BE, HUH?

"OKAY. GO AHEAD.

"DO VAT YOU VANT.

( laughter )

"WHO AM I?

"NOBODY.

"JUST MOTHER.

"GO AHEAD, THROW...YOUR LIFE... AVAY.

"IS THIS THE VAYIT'S GOING TO BE FOR YOU, HUH?

VUN VOMAN AFTER ANOTHERFOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?"

GOD, I HOPE SO.

( laughter )

"YOU TINK EVERYTHINGIS SO FUNNY."

AND I DO.

I REALLY DO.

RIGHT NOW I'M HAVINGTHE BEST TIME OF MY WHOLE LIFE

AND SHE'S PROBABLYRUNNING INTO SOMEONE SOMEWHERE

AT A SUPERMARKET,AND HAS TO TALK ABOUT ME.

CAN YOU IMAGINEWHAT THAT'S LIKE?

"OH, HI.NICE TO BE SEEING YOU, TOO.

"OH, BOTH YOUR CHILDRENGRADUATED. GOOD.

"GOOD. MMM, A DOCTORAND A LAWYER. HOW NICE."

( chuckling ):"MY DAUGHTER?

"NO.

( laughter )

"NO.

"NO.

( laughter )

"OH, VAT'S SHE DOING?

( chuckles )

"MY DAUGHTER... IS A COMEDIENNE.

"AND A LESBIAN.

( laughter )

"BOTH AT THE SAME TIME.

( laughter and applause )

"OH, YEAH...

LIKE A DREAM COME TRUE."

THANKS A LOT.YOU HAVE BEEN WONDERFUL.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU, NEW YORK!

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