Bryan Gutmann - Humpty Dumpty

Season 2, Ep 0203 06/28/2007 Views: 1,543

The rhyme about Humpty Dumpty has a depressing ending. (2:33)

with that, uh,childhood nursery rhyme

about Humpty Dumpty.

And it kinda hasthat depressing ending,

tragic ending.

It's not funny.

It is, it's sad.

You know, where he says, uh...

"And all the king's horses,and all the king's men,

Couldn't put Humptyback together again."

Uh, here's an idea.

Maybe don't give the horsesthe first go at it.

Yeah, they're just horses.

(whispers):I think they're justmaking it worse.

Shut up-- thoseare the king's horses.

We're gonna get in trouble.

So, yeah, uh,I live in Austin now.

which is, uh...a pretty sweet place.

If you've never been there,you should check it out.

Austin's a cool place.

Although, I have to say

that, uh, now that I live there,

I actually findI'm around the people

that I can't standto be around the most.

Which are theseelitist people.

You know,

like hipster peoplethat have an opinion

on, like, everythingyou should wear,

and, like, all the cool musicyou should listen to.

And, you know, like, they'llcritique any movie you like

you know, just like,as you're watching something,

walk into the roomand just be like,



You like Short Circuit?

The book is better."

And there's a lot of peopleI don't think I'll ever get.

But always number oneon the list...

is the "I'm going to peel outof this parking lot" guy.

You know, you never see him,you just hear him.

At like 2:00... in the morning.

What is everyone

supposed to think, you know?

What does he want you to do?

Like hear him and justturn to your friend

like, "Look out for that guy.

"That guy is a bad ass.

"Do you think that's Vin Diesel?

I don't want to find out."

And then, like, what is hethinking too, you know?

Just like, peels outof this parking lot,

Just gets all super-excited.

Like, "Tonightthe grocery store!

"But tomorrow...

my old high school."