Jimmy Carr - Chubby Chasers

  • Season 9 , Ep 3
  • 01/13/2005
  • Views: 12,783

Chubby chasers rarely have to do much chasing. (2:18)

I REMEMBER BEFORE J-LO, BEFORE

THE TERM "GHETTO BOOTIE"...

[LAUGHTER]

WHEN WE USED TO JUST CALL IT A

FAT ASS.

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

YOU KNOW THAT QUESTION YOU GET

ASKED, AND I'M SURE ALL THE MEN

WILL RECOGNIZE THIS.

YOU GET ASKED OCCASIONALLY,

"DOES MY BUM LOOK BIG IN THIS"

BY YOUR PARTNER.

I'VE DISCOVERED THE WORSE THING

YOU CAN SAY IS NOT "YES."

THE WORST THING YOU CAN SAY WHEN

YOU'RE ASKED, "DOES MY BUM LOOK

BIG IN THIS?"

IS, "LET ME STEP BACK, GET IT

ALL IN."

[LAUGHTER]

MY GIRLFRIEND USED TO GET UPSET

BECAUSE I LEFT THE TOILET SEAT

UP.

SO I DON'T DO THAT ANYMORE.

PUT IT DOWN.

BUT THERE'S NO WINNING WITH HER.

NOW SHE GETS ANNOYED 'CAUSE IT'S

COVERED IN PISS.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ASKED TO DO

THE DISHES?

AND YOU'VE DONE A REALLY BAD JOB

JUST SO YOU DON'T GET ASKED

AGAIN?

[LAUGHTER]

MY GIRLFRIEND DOES THE SAME

THING WITH [BLEEP].

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I'VE GOT A FRIEND.

HE PICKED UP TWO GIRLS LAST

WEEK.

I SAID, "THEY'RE LIKE BUSES."

HE SAID, "YEAH, YOU WAIT AGES

AND THEN TWO COME ALONG AT

ONCE."

I SAID, "NO, 'THEY' ARE LIKE

BUSES."

[LAUGHTER]

SOMEONE CAME UP TO ME AND

COMPLAINED ABOUT THAT JOKE AFTER

A SHOW LAST WEEK.

QUITE A BIG BONED GIRL.

SHE SAID, "I THINK YOU'RE

FATTEST."

I SAID, "NO, NO, NO, I THINK

YOU'RE FATTEST."

[LAUGHTER]

ANYWAY THESE MEN THAT LIKE WOMEN

WHO ARE CAN'T LEAVE THE HOUSE

FAT, THEY'RE CALLED CHUBBY

CHASERS.

I RATHER LIKE THAT TERM,

"CHUBBY CHASERS".

I JUST WONDER HOW MUCH CHASING

IS ACTUALLY GOING ON.

[LAUGHTER]

A LITTLE BIT OF WADDLING IN

WHEEZING, THEN "GOTCHA."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

Loading...