Pablo Francisco - Hand Jokes

Pablo Francisco: They Put It Out There Season 1, Ep 0101 11/05/2011 Views: 7,985

Pablo Francisco imagines how Regis Philbin would read Penthouse Forum. (2:45)

NOW, WHAT ELSE? WHAT ELSE?

[chuckles]I GOT THESE JOKES--ON MY HAND.

I'M GONNA--YEAH, THESE ARE--THESE ARE NEW JOKES THAT I WANT

TO TRY FOR THIS SPECIAL.

I HOPE YOU LIKE THEM.

THEY'RE CALLED HAND JOKES.

I HOPE YOU LIKE THEM.

THEY HAVE AN INTRO.

[imitates trumpeting]IT'S A HAND.

"ARE YOU IN GOOD HANDSWITH HAND JOKES?"

HERE WE GO.

HERE IS--OKAY, ARE YOU READY FORTHIS ONE?

THIS IS DANNY GLOVER READING PENTHOUSE FORUM.

"SLOWLY, SHE UNZIPPED MY FLY.

YEAH.

AND THEN, CHECK IT OUT.

SHE PULLED OUT MY MAMMOTHOF LOVE.

YEAH, RIGHT ON.

THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, SHE WASPUMPIN' IT LIKE A 12-GAUGE

SHOTGUN.

YEAH.

I WAS HAVING AN ORGASM AS IFMY PENIS WAS A BROKEN

SPRINKLER HEAD."

[cheers and applause]SORRY.

MAYBE, MAYBE--OKAY, MAYBE WE'LLTRY IT WITH, LIKE,

REGIS PHILBIN.

"SLOWLY, SHE UNZIPPED MY FLY.

AND THEN, CHECK IT OUT.

SHE PULLED OUT MY MAMMOTHOF LOVE.

THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, SHE WASPUMPIN' IT LIKE A 12-GAUGE

SHOTGUN.

I WAS HAVING AN ORGASM--OH!

SHE SAID, 'IS THAT YOUR FINALANSWER?'"

HERE'S A BULL RIDERMASTURBATING.

HERE WE GO.

honk!

[cheers and applause]

HERE IS A LATINO MASTURBATING.

HERE WE GO.

[trilling lips] "SI."

[chuckles]HERE IS SPIDER-MAN MASTURBATING.

THE NEXT TIME A GIRL SAYS,"I'M ON MY PERIOD"--

"I'M ON MY PERIOD,"SAY, "IS YOUR MOUTH

ON ITS PERIOD?"[cheers and applause]

>> [howls]>> THERE YOU GO.

HERE'S MICHAEL JACKSON STEPPINGINTO DOG CRAP AND WIPING IT OFF.

HERE WE GO, MICHAEL JACKSONSTEPPING...

BECAUSE THEY PUT IT OUT THERE.

THEY PUT IT OUT THERE.