Me and my buddy Kevinused to, uh...
we used to, um...
wear fake mustachesall the time.
And we went to the movies, wh...
Fake mustaches are amazing.
Like, if you're a grown-up guy?
Wear fake mustaches...
as-as often as you can,
'cause it's just like...Just go out.
And do your, like...don't act weird.
Go around town wearinga fake mustache,
act all regular.
People don't knowhow to deal with a guy
wearing a fake mustache,
acting all normal.
Like, it pisses some people off.
They're just like,"What the hell's
"that guy doing over there?
What, is he having fun over 30?"
"Let's kick his ass!"
We used to wear fake mustachesall the time for fun.
We went to the movies,uh, one time.
We were wearingour fake mustaches.
And, uh, we buy our, uh...
we buy our movie tickets,
and the guy behind the counter,he's like, uh,
"Well, where do youwant to sit?"
And we're like,"I don't care. Wherever."
He's like, "Well, there'sassigned seating
in this theater.
It was some specialtheater or whatever.
He's like, "You haveto choose seats."
So he turns the computerscreen around
to show us the seating chart,
and I notice there areonly two other tickets
purchased forthe movie that day.
There are just two seatsright next to each other
in the middle of the theater.
So I said to the guy,I was like,
"We'll have the, those two seats
on either sideof those two people there."
And he giggles.He gets it. (chuckles)
Gives us our tickets.
And we go into the theater,
and we sit inour assigned seats.
Those people aren't there yet.
There's, like, two empty seatsin between us.
And we're beside ourselveswith how funny we think we are.
We're, like, (chortling)
"Keep it together, man!"
After about, like, you know,ten, 15 minutes,
this couple comes walking in,it's, like, a guy and a girl.
And the guy's, like,looking at his ticket.
He, like, looks at us.
Looks back to his ticket.
Sees the row.
Like, he figures outthat's going on.
And he turns to his girlfriend,and he goes,
"See? I (bleep) told you."
What the (bleep)did he tell her?
It's not... (chuckles)
It's not an I-told-you-sosituation at all.