- Excuse me, what are you doing?
- Rubbing my nuts on Mr.Peeper's mustache comb.
- Now Jay, we may have all daydreamed about
having our special private areas straightened by
a walrus comb, but this kind of impudence will not stand.
I am telling.
Mr. Peepers, Mr. Peepers!
- What is it Garfield?
- This boy's gone feral.
- Mr. Peepers, Garfield taught me to clean the chamber pots.
(accomplished musical chord)
- Garfield, this is your emergency?
When I took you in from the orphanage all those years ago,
the proctor told me you would be unruly,
but I said I could mold you.
It's the greatest mistake of my life.
- He's the mistake, I'm the good orphan.
- Hold your tongue.
Your behavior in inexcusable.
Oh, my mustache comb.
Oh that smells piquant.