Egg Sandwiches

Assignment: Daytime Talk Pilot Season 1, Ep 9 08/09/2006 Views: 8,402

While Kevin interviews his guests on "Beekin and Eggs," Marty, Tillie and Alan enjoy an episode of "That's So Raven." (3:28)

What areyou doing?

We've been stuckon camera fourfor two minutes.

You ever seen That's So Raven?


This is that episode whereshe goes to the picnic.

To the picnic?Yeah.

( laughing )

Oh, that is so Raven.

Yeah, I say thata lot, too.

All right, how about this,the ozone?

How do we even knowthat this ozone layer exists,

that all the scientiststalk about?

Well, uh, two things...

If I asked ten peoplein this audience

if they thoughtthe ozone layer existed

and they said yeah,does that mean it exists?


Who thinks the ozone layerexists?

Look at that--50-50 almost.

So is science like American Idol?


Just whoever thinks it exists,is that what exists?

Not quite.

Is it a popularity contest?

This sounds a bit likescientific mumbo jumbo, ifyou don't mind me saying so.

For example, my grandmotherused to say all the time

they'd never invent Velcro.

Then two years after her death,they invented it.

That's pretty prescienton her part.Exactly.

They say we're goingto run out of fossils.

Are we?

But fossils haveother uses as well.

( applause )You can study evolutionfor example.

I agree, but...

Guys, whatare you doing?

We've been on camera twofor like seven minutes.

Shh. Marty, we're watching That's So Raven.

The picnic episode.

( laughing )

That's so very typicalof the behavior

I've come to expectof Raven.

All right, give it upfor Gary.

( theme music plays )

Are the Hot Button guests here?Any minute.

That's the only thingthat's going to savethis sorry show.

It's going great.No, it's not.

Keep dancing.

I'd love to hear what you haveto say

about the stateof our great nation.

And what better way to do itthan over an egg sandwich.

Now, who wants to saywhat's on their mind?

Let's put the world to right

and enjoy an egg sandwichwhile we're at it.

What's the biggest thingthat upsets you in the world?

Hard to...

hard to say.

Marty, where the ( bleep )are Lawson and Fortune?

I don't know.I don't know.

Hot Button's infive minutes.

I don't knowwhat to tell you.

What car servicedid you use?

I didn't usea car service.

I thought you were doingthe car service.

Marty, I don't do thatadministrative crap. Come on.

Tillie, that meansthey're not coming.

Well, what are goingto tell Kevin?

I... I don't know whatwe're going to tell Kevin.

Um, okay...

We have to thinkof something.

Um, a...

Helicopter crash.

What ticks you off or whatwould you like to vent about

here on Beekin and Eggs, eating our egg sandwich?

Take your time.

The show stillgoing on?



The Hot Button guests, uh...Yeah?

Where are they?

There's beena helicopter crash.

Stop. Tillie, stop it.

I taught you the helicoptercrash excuse in '04.

Oh. Well...

This is it. I'm done.

What?I'm done.

( TV plays )

That is so Osama bin Laden.

Will he ever learn?