Josh Sneed - Life Lesson

  • Season 11 , Ep 18
  • 03/29/2007
  • Views: 9,070

Josh prefers when bras are 100% off. (2:07)

WITH A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR. IS THAT TRUE, LADIES?

- "YEAH, IT SURE IS."- [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

EVERY MONTH IN MAXIM, I READ-- THE HOTTEST CHICK

IN HOLLYWOOD,LYING THERE HALF-NAKED. THEY'RE LIKE,

"WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY?" "WELL, REALLY AS LONG AS

HE MAKES ME LAUGH." OKAY, WHATEVER.

I CAN TELL YOU FROM EXPERIENCETHAT BEING FUNNY

DOES NOT HELP YOU GET THE FIRST DATE.

I WAS WALKING THROUGH THIS MALL AND THERE WAS A GIRL

IN FRONT OF VICTORIA'S SECRET WHO STOPPED ME SHE WAS LIKE,

"HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?"I WAS LIKE, "GOOD, HOW ARE YOU?"

SHE GOES, ""ARE YOU SHOPPINGFOR A WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND TODAY?"

"NO. WHY?" SHE GOES,"WELL, WE'RE HAVING THIS

AFTER CHRISTMAS SALE AND ALL OUR BRAS ARE 50% OFF."

AND I GO, "I LIKE WHEN YOUR BRAS ARE A HUNDRED PERCENT OFF."

I MEAN, IT CAME OUT THAT QUICK. I'M NOT GONNA LIE TO YOU GUYS.

IT WAS THE PROUDESTI'VE EVER BEEN IN MY LIFE, OKAY?

- NO, I'M SERIOUS. OKAY? - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

NOT 'CAUSE IT'S HILARIOUS, BUT THE TIMING WAS IMPECCABLE;

BUT SHE DIDN'T EVEN GET IT.

SHE'S LIKE, "100%? [SCOFFS]

SIR, THEN THEY'D BE FREE."

AND I'M LIKE, "WELL, THAT'S ONE WAY OF PUTTING IT--

- THEY SURE WOULD." - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

SHE GETS EVEN MORE CONFUSED. SHE'S LIKE, "Allison.

This guy says he wants ourbras 'One hundred percent off.'"

"DOES HE? WELL, SIR,

THEN WE WOULDN'T MAKE ANY MONEY." AND I'M LIKE,

"YOU KNOW, I THINK YOU'RE WRONG THERE, TOO."

- [LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]- BUT YOU KNOW HERE'S MY THING--

THANK YOU.

I WAS PROUD.

I MEAN, IT DIDN'T GO THE WAY I HOPED IT WOULD.

BUT IT DID HELP ME LEARNA VALUABLE LIFE LESSON

THAT I STRESS TO EVERYONE:

DO WHAT MAKES FOR A BETTER STORY IN YOUR LIFE, RIGHT?

IF I'D HAVE JUST KEPT WALKING PAST HER,

YOU GUYS WOULDN'T HAVECARED ABOUT THAT STORY.

BUT I DIDN'T, AND NOW YOU HAVE A LITTLE JOKE TO SHARE, RIGHT?

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