Tom Cotter - Florida

  • Season 8 , Ep 13
  • 03/11/2004
  • Views: 4,295

Florida is Tom Cotter's favorite state because of the way it's shaped. (1:40)

Tom Cotter: I WAS RECENTLY

ON A PLANE.

I'M FLYING DOWN TO THE

OLD COUNTRY, FLORIDA.

[LAUGHTER]

I LOVE FLORIDA.

IT'S MY FAVORITE STATE 'CAUSE

IT'S SHAPED LIKE A PENIS PEEING

ON THE CARIBBEAN.

AND...

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

I WAS DOWN THERE, NOT ON A

PENIS.

I WAS IN FLORIDA.

AND I, AH...

[LAUGHTER]

I HAVE A QUESTION, HOW COME

OLD PEOPLE CAN'T JUST WEAR

SUNGLASSES LIKE THE REST OF US?

WHY DO THEY HAVE TO WEAR THOSE

HUGE VIRTUAL REALITY GOGGLES?

HAVE YOU SEEN THOSE?

[LAUGHTER]

AS IF NANA'S GONNA GO DO SOME

WELDING, PLEASE.

YES, GRANDPA, YOU'RE THE

TERMINATOR.

RIGHT.

[LAUGHTER]

I WAS HAVING FUN IN FLORIDA.

I WAS RIDING A HORSE IN FLORIDA

AND IT'S LEG WAS BROKEN.

SO I HAD TO SHOOT IT.

AND EVERYBODY IN THE CAROUSAL

FREAKED OUT.

[LAUGHTER]

AND THEY THREW ME OUT OF THE

THEME PARK.

AND THAT WAS HUMILIATING.

I WENT PARASAILING, HAVE YOU

EVER BEEN PARASAILING?

THAT'S A LOT OF FUN, RIGHT.

A SPEEDBOAT TAKES OFF AND ALL

THE SUDDEN THE PARACHUTE FILLS

UP WITH AIR.

AND WITHIN SECONDS YOU'RE

SOARING UP IN THE SKY.

I FELT LIKE A BIRD, I FELT LIKE

I COULD FLY.

SO I TOOK A DUMP RIGHT ON THE

BOAT, ANYBODY?

[LAUGHTER]

JUST ME.

OKAY, GOOD.

I WAS GOLFING DOWN THERE AT A

REALLY NICE CLUB.

AND I WAS HAVING A GOOD ROUND

ABOUT THE FOURTH HOLE I GET

BITTEN BY A WASP BECAUSE THEY

DON'T ALLOW CATHOLICS TO PLAY ON

SOME OF THESE COURSES.

AND...

[LAUGHTER]

Loading...