Uncensored - Michael Kosta - Mr. Mature

South Beach Comedy Festival 2011 Season 1, Ep 5 03/07/2011 Views: 3,825

Michael Kosta would like all mothers on Facebook to cancel their accounts right away. (2:19)

-Exciting news everybody.

My mother is now on Facebook.

Thank you very much.

Any mothers on Facebook?

Clap your hands mothersif you're on Facebook.

That's great.

Cancel your goddamnaccounts mothers.

Cancel your Facebook accounts.

You're ruining yourchildren's lives on Facebook.

Oh my God!

I posted today, hey, I'mgoing to do a comedy show.

It's going to be on jokes.com.

It's in an outdoor mall.

It's going to be around 9:00 PM.

I post it on my status.

Six, seven seconds later,new comment, Janice Kosta.

We love you, pickle.

Iron your shirt-- no, Janice!

Cancel your account.

Everybody in the wholeworld can see this.

My dad asked me ifI was on Spacebook.

Yeah, Dad, it'scalled Spacebook.

That's what it's called, Dad.

Nice job there, pal.

I'm the one dressed as anastronaut you fucking idiot.

It's actually calledFacespace, Dad.

My dad's an idiot.

I found my ex-girlfriendon Facebook.

That's tough.

Finding your ex on Facebook.

Oh my God.

It's hard.

I told her though.

When she broke up with me Isaid, look, I will find you.

Do you know what I mean?

812 photos she hadon her Facebook page.

That's a lot of photosof an ex-girlfriend.

I commented on everysingle one of those photos.

Remember us?

Remember us?

She had her weddingalbum up there,

my ex-girlfriend, wedding album.

Might as well cut out myheart and just trample on it.

Now, I'm not saying I'mMr. Mature, everybody.

But here's what I did.

I went to the firstphotograph of her and her

new husband looking so happy.

And I just wrote,I was there first.

That's what I wrote.

I'm not saying I'm mature.

I'm not saying I'm mature.

And then I liked my own comment.

You think I give a shit?

Do you think I give a shit?

And then I unliked itand I liked it again,

then I unliked it,and I liked it again.

So she can kept gettingnotified over and over again.

Michael Kosta likeshis own comment.