by buying one of thoseGPS navigation systems,
which sounds exactly like my extelling me where to go
and what to doand also not sleeping with me.
It's very creepy.
"In seven miles, make a left."
"You are sexually inadequate."
"In six miles, turn right, so Ican sleep with your friends."
They even have a button on it.
In case you get tired of thatvoice, you can hear,
like, an alternativelifestyle voice,
which I liketo dabble in occasionally.
"In seven miles...
"Listen, your buns feel super."
"Why don't we just finda rest area and do this thing?"
Now, here's the thing.I don't mind gay people.
Friction's friction. I don'tlike to judge people that way.
But is anybody else pissed off
that gay peoplestole the rainbow?
Am I the only one
wondering what the hellhappened to the rainbow?
Now when I look at a rainbow,I got to think of man on man
monkey butt-love?That doesn't seem fair.
There are a million thingsyou guys could have taken
to symbolize your movement.
What about the unicorn?It's not doing anything.
That is a majestic beast.
It's got a nice, long horn, too.
That's a one-stop (bleep) shop,last I checked.
Some people think
it's a bad idea to put gay dudesin the military.
Of course you put gay peoplein the military.
You cannot torture a gay dude.
Look what they do for fun.
It would drive the enemy crazy.
They would have no ideawhat to do.
"I'm going to take electrodes.
"I'm going to hook oneto your hee-hee
"and none to your hoo-hoo.
A gay guy would be like,
"Super. Let's schedule thatand redo it at brunch."