Natasha Leggero - Having a Baby & Dying Alone

Crash Test with Rob Huebel and Paul Scheer Season 1, Ep 1 01/22/2016 Views: 807

Natasha Leggero discusses vaping, wonders why people have children, shows off her dog and talks about diamonds and fur. (1:51)

Great to be here.

Anyone else addictedto these things?

So cool and new, we don't evenknow the side effects yet.

Literally, notesting's been done.

Perfect for the healthconscious pregnant teen.

I will never bepregnant-- for long.

My girlfriends, who arein their 30's, are all

freaking out becausethey want to have babies.

Meanwhile, men who are 38 arebarely ready for pet ownership.

I would rather walk inon a man hanging himself

while jerking off then havethem have one of those "Call

of Duty" headsets on.

That's the one where you protectour country from your couch

while you're eating a sandwich.

This is the guyI'm going to trust

to be the sperm donorto the Asian surrogate

that's going to carry my child?

That is a big decisionin a gal's life.

I mean, why do you a kid?

So you don't die alone, I guess.

Right?

I don't know though.

I remember when my grandmadied, she was pissing the bed

and shitting herself.

Calling me the "N word."

Think I want tobe alone for that.

I'm wearing Kirklanddiamonds this evening.

Anyone?

Costco diamonds?

I'm not afraid to get mydiamonds where I get my salsa.

Tiffany's is great but I can'teat a churro while I check out.

This is Cutie.

Cutie, sit.

Don't worry, thisone's been declawed.

It's amazing the clothes you canpick up at the animal shelter.

These boots were madefrom a pit bull that

couldn't get potty trained.

Fur's wasted oncreatures too stupid

to realize how glamorous it is.

And by creatures,I mean Beyonce.