T.J. Miller - El Amor No Originales

  • Season 1 , Ep 1
  • 10/09/2012
  • Views: 13,635

There's only a limited amount of words in the English language that make sense for T.J. Miller to say to a female. (1:49)

THAT'S SO BAD THAT COLDPLAYSTARTS TO MAKE SENSE?

[laughter]

WE'VE ALL DONE THAT.

PART OF THE REASONMY EX-WIFE AND I SPLIT UP

IS BECAUSE...

SHE READ MY EMAILS.

ANY LADIES IN HERE

GO THROUGHTHEIR FELLAS' EMAILS?

WHERE YOU AT?[scattered whooping]

OKAY.

GOT ANY LADIES IN HERETHAT ARE STAYING

AS STILL AS POSSIBLESO AS NOT TO BETRAY THE FACT

THEY GO THROUGH THEIR GUYS'EMAILS, WHERE YOU AT?

[laughter]

SHE WENT THROUGH PAST EMAILS.WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?

DON'T DO THAT.

EMAILS THAT I HAD SENTTO EX-GIRLFRIENDS

THAT I JUST HADN'T DELETED.

SHE JUST WANTED TO RUINHER WHOLE WEEK.

[laughter]

I FELT SO BAD.SHE CAME TO ME AND SHE GOES,

"YOU'RE SUCHAN UNORIGINAL JERK.

"YOU KNOW THAT?

"EVERYTHING THAT YOU'VE SAIDTO ME,

YOU SAID TO SOMEBODY ELSE."

I WAS LIKE,"UH, YEAH.

OF COURSE."

THERE'S ONLYA LIMITED AMOUNT OF WORDS

IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGETHAT MAKE SENSE

TO SAY TO A FEMALE.

IF YOU CAN ONLY USE 'EM ONCE,

YOU'RE GONNA RUN OUTAND BE LIKE,

"GARBAGE TRUCK, BANANA BOAT."

DID SHE WANT ME TO MAKESOMETHING UP?

I WOULD HAVE.I LOVED HER WITH ALL MY HEART.

SHE WANT ME TO COME UPTO HER AND GO, "HEY,

"I LOVE YOU SO MUCH,BUT I WOULD NEVER SAY THAT,

"BECAUSE I'VE ALREADY SAID ITBEFORE.

"INSTEAD, I WANT TO SAYTHAT YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY

"FEDEK OOYA PATARM.

"AND WHEN WE ARE TOGETHER,

"IT IS SO SHUCKY MOOKA UHER UT PETZ.

AND I'VE NEVER SAID ANYOF THIS TO ANYBODY BEFORE."

[laughter]

"BUT SOMETIMES,WHEN WE MAKE LOVE,

IT IS ABSOLUTELY[many nonsense words]."

[continues speakingnonsensical words]

[cheers and applause]

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