Aries Spears - Heat

  • Season 9 , Ep 15
  • 05/19/2005
  • Views: 17,088

Aries reenacts a scene from "Heat" with Al Pacino and Robert DeNiro. (3:02)

I'M A BIG MOVIE FAN, YA KNOW.

I WANT TO BE ONE OF THOSE CATS

LIKE WILL SMITH.

MAKE $20 DOLLARS A MOVIE.

AND I'M AT A VERY FRUSTRATING

POINT IN MY CAREER 'CAUSE

I'M NOT A MILLIONAIRE.

LIKE PEOPLE ASSUME 'CAUSE YOU

IN MOVIES OR TV, YOU'RE RICH.

I'M NOT RICH, BUT I'M FAR FROM

BROKE.

I'M WHAT YOU CALL A

THOUSANDAIRE, 'CAUSE YOU KNOW

A LOT OF BROTHER BLOW UP AND GET

THE PLATINUM AND THE

BLING BLING.

I GOT A LITTLE BIT OF PLATINUM

AND GOLD, I GOT LIKE THE

MR. T STARTER KIT.

I'M TRYING TO...

[LAUGHTER]

BUT I HEAR ABOUT THESE

ENTERTAINERS, THESE ACTORS THAT

GET PAID $20 A MOVIE TO ACT.

AND THE KEY WORD IS ACT.

BUT THEY PAY THIS TO GUYS WHO

CAN'T ACT.

HOW DO YOU PAY STALLONE AND

SCHWARZENEGGER $20 A MOVIE?

PAY THAT TO THE GUYS WHO

DESERVE IT LIKE, PACINO,

DeNIRO, DENZELL, JACK NICHOLSON,

THOSE GUYS ARE ACTORS.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

'CAUSE TO THIS DAY ONE OF MY

FAVORITE MOVIES OF ALL TIME IS

HEAT WITH PACINO AND DENIRO...

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

THAT SCENE WHERE THEY MEET

FOR THE FIRST TIME AND PACINO'S

SITTING THERE TALKING TO DeNIRO

BREAKING IT DOWN.

[AS PACINO] "YOU SIR, ARE A

BAD GUY, I'M THE POLICE.

IT'S MY JOB TO STOP GUYS

LIKE YOU MURDERERS,

[SNAPS]-- RAPISTS,

[SNAP]-- KILLERS.

IT'S WHAT I DO.

THERE MAY COME A TIME WHEN

OUR PATHS CROSS, I MIGHT

TAKE YOU DOWN.

I WON'T LIKE IT BUT I'LL DO IT.

KEEPS ME HOT-- [SNAP],

ON MY TOES-- [SNAP]

WHERE I GOTTA BE."

DeNIRO COMES BACK.

[AS DeNIRO] "YA KNOW THERE'S A

FLIP SIDE TO THAT COIN.

GOOD FRIEND OF MINE, JIMMY STAG

ONCE TOLD ME NEVER GET ATTACHED

TO ANYTHING YOU CANNOT WALK OUT

ON IN 15 SECONDS FLAT, IF YOU

SPOT THE HEAT COMING AROUND

THE CORNER.

AND I ALSO LIKE GUYS LIKE YOU

THAT LIKE GUYS LIKE ME 'CAUSE

YOU KEEP ME HOT ON MY TOES WHERE

I GOTTA BE.

YOU'RE RIGHT OUR PATHS THEY MAY

CROSS, I MIGHT HAVE TO TAKE YOU

DOWN.

I WON'T LIKE IT BUT I WILL NOT,

[SMACKS LIPS] HESITATE."

NOW, THAT'S A GREAT SCENE.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

NOW PICTURE THE EXACT SAME SCENE

WITH STALLONE AND

SCHWARZENEGGER.

YOU AIN'T GONNA BE ABLE TO

UNDERSTAND [BLEEP].

STALLONE IS DOING PACINO...

[AS STALLONE] "YO, I AIN'T TAKE

YOU DOWN, I TOLD YOU ROCKY

[MUMBLES]"

[AS SCHWARZENEGGER] "YOU KNOW,

THERE'S A FLIP SIDE TO THAT

COIN, I MIGHT YOU HAVE TO TAKE

YOU DOWN.

I WON'T LIKE IT BUT I'LL DO IT".

[GRUNTING]

YOU'RE LIKE WHAT?

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

THAT'S A HORRIBLE NOISE...

[AS ARNOLD] ARRR, ARRR!

CAN YOU IMAGINE HIM ASKING

HIS WOMAN TO GO [BLEEP] ON HIM?

"MARIA C'MON, GIVE ME [BLEEP],

GO [BLEEP].

[LAUGHTER]

DON'T COME UP FOR AIR, ARRR!"

ARRR!

FELLAS, THAT'S A CRAZY A NOISE

TO MAKE WHEN YOU WITH YOUR

WOMAN.

NEXT TIME YOU WITH YOUR WOMAN

DOING IT FROM THE BACK JUST MAKE

THAT NOISE.

ARRRR!

ARRRR!

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH

YOU?!"

[AS ARNOLD] "DON'T WORRY ABOUT

WHAT IS GOING ON UP HERE,

PUT IT DOWN."

LADIES, IT'LL WORK FOR YOU, TOO.

YOUR MAN WANTS YOU TO GO [BLEEP]

ON HIM YOU DON'T REALLY WANT TO.

JUST DO THAT, IT'LL STOP.

ARRRR!

"WHAT THE... BITCH?"

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

"NO, I'M GOOD, GO ON, NO, NO

I'M GOOD, GO ON.

JUST BRING ME THE JERGINS.

BRING ME THE JERGINS."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

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