Interpreting Japan's Fancy Robot Toilets

Wednesday, January 18, 2017 01/18/2017 Views: 179

Erin Gibson, Bryan Safi and Judah Friedlander explain the meaning behind Tokyo's confusing high-tech toilet symbols. (1:52)

Tokyo, of course, won the right

to host the nextSummer Olympics,

narrowly beating out other

qualified hosts for 2020.In preparation

for the influxof foreign visitors to Tokyo

for the 2020 games,the JSEIA,

the agency that regulatesJapan's fancy robot (bleep),

came up with a guideto help tourists interpret

their electronic space toiletswith diagrams

for what each button does.

This actually is a thingthat they need to do.

I was in Japan for my honeymoon,

and sometimes you do getthe pictures on the buttons,

and other times, it's just allJapanese characters,

and you're just like...

And you don't know.

Like, now I'm filled with water,now the seat's lifting,

now it's heating up, nowit's launching me into space.

-(laughter) -This does make itless confusing.

So, comedians, some of thesedon't seem any more helpful, but

please pick a symbol and tell uswhat it actually means. Gibson.

Um, the...

lower right swirly.

Yeah. That's for whenyou don't know you're pregnant

-but then you poop out a baby.-(laughter)

(applause)

-(Hardwick mumbles)-You know when you're like,

"Oops, I'm pregnant, uh-oh"?

-Bryan Safi. -I likedthe second one on the top.

That's exactly...For when you want a woman

to sit on you,and also, you're an Ares.

-All right, points. Very good.-So...

-Very good.-(applause)

-Judah.-Uh, the bottom row,

the second one from the right

looks like, uh...

you know, instr... you know,instructions for how to, like,

finish a bowel movementduring a tornado.

-All right, points. Yeah.-(laughter)

It's very important.

Ah, this one's an F-5.

This one I can't figure out.

This one feels sort of farty,like this seems like hot air.

This is pretty self-explanatory.

This is the button that allowsTrump to pee on your tits.

-(laughter, groans, applause)-Uh...

That's what... I thinkthat's what that says.