Bonnie McFarlane - Dating Jews

  • Season 12, Ep 11
  • 02/14/2008
  • Views: 6,707

Bonnie married a moneygrubber. (2:04)

THE GROUP IS--LIKE REALLY EMPOWERED WOMEN

SORT OF FREAK ME OUT A LITTLE.YOU KNOW THE ONES.

THEY'RE LIKE, "EH,WE'RE THE NUMBER ONE GENDER.

CHICKS RULE."AND IT KINDA MAKES ME CRINGE.

YOU KNOW, BECAUSE IF YOUREALLY ARE SUPERIOR,

YOU DON'T GO AROUNDSAYING YOU'RE SUPERIOR.UNLESS YOU'RE JEWISH.

AND LOOK HOW THAT TURNED OUT.NOBODY LIKES THEM. SO...

LET'S LEARN FROM THEIR MISTAKES.THAT'S ALL I'M SAYING.

[LAUGHTER]

IN OTHER COUNTRIESI'M TALKING ABOUT,NOBODY LIKES THEM.

- IN THIS COUNTRY, WE DO.- [LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

NOT YOU, BUT OTHERS.I LOVE JEWS. I LOVE--

I MARRIED A MONEYGRUBBER.SO THERE YOU GO.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I'VE ALWAYS DATED JEWISH MEN.AND I DON'T KNOW WHY.

WHAT AM I SAYING?I KNOW EXACTLY WHY THAT IS.

IT'S-- IT'S BECAUSEI HAVE A REALLY LITTLE VAGINA.

SO YEAH, IT JUST WORKS OUT.IT WORKS OUT. IT'S A WIN-WIN.

- EVERYBODY'S HAPPY.- [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

SO WHEN I WAS SINGLE,I LIVED IN A GARAGE.

AND-- LIKE A REAL GARAGE.NOT LIKE FONZY.

I LIVED IN A GAR--WHICH WAS-- YOU KNOW,WHEN YOU'RE DATING

AND YOU LIVE IN A GARAGE,IT DOES GET AWKWARD.

YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE I--AT THE END OF A DATE,IT'D BE LIKE, "THANKS.

I HAD A GREAT TIME.OKAY, CALL ME. ALL RIGHT."

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

I LOVE TO SWEAR.I LOVE TO SWEAR AT BABIES.

YOU CAN TOTALLY SWEAR TO A BABY.IT'S FINE.

IT DOES NO PSYCHOLOGICAL DAM--THEY DON'T EVEN DEVELOP A MEMORY

TILL THEY'RE LIKE TWO.SO GO CRAZY. HAVE FUN WITH IT.

"WHO'S MY LITTLE[BLEEP] BABY, HUH?

WHO'S MY LITTLE[BLEEP] BABY?"

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

WHAT'S THE WORSTTHAT COULD HAPPEN?

WHEN THEY GET OLDERAND SOMEONE SWEARS AT THEM,THEY'LL LIKE IT.

- BUT THEY WON'T KNOW WHY.- [LAUGHTER]

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