Alfred Robles - Guys Are Liars

Tony Baker & Alfred Robles Season 2, Ep 5 11/01/2012 Views: 4,990

Alfred Robles advises women to only believe half of men's stories. (1:50)


Believe half of the story.

If you meet a guy todayand he tells you he's a cop,

he's lying, believe half.

He's a security guard.

I know, I tell girlsI was in the Navy.

Believe half-- I usedto work at Old Navy.

And my brother,my brother got a tattoo.

He got his pictureof his kids on his back.

I asked him,"Why'd you get that for?"

He goes, "Because I cantake their pictures

everywhere I go now."

I told him, "You shouldhave bought a wallet.

It's cheaper."

That's how we are,Mexicans are proud people.

You ever see a Mexicanwith a tattoo of an Indian?

You ask himwhat tribe is he from.

"I don't know, bro, I seen thatmovie Apoc-ta-lypto."

We're the only people like that.

Right, you never seea white guy with a pilgrim.


You never seean Italian girl with Snookie.


Never happen, right?

You'll never see a Cubanwith a life raft.

And I voted for Obama--clap if you voted for Obama.


I know Obama's notdoing so good right now.

I think Obama should just havea big-ass press conference

and say, "You know what America?

"I'm sorry I've been messing up,

but I was molested."