Kyle Kinane - Pho Soup

Kyle Kinane: Whiskey Icarus Season 1, Ep 1 11/24/2012 Views: 24,312

Kyle Kinane will continue to support the Vietnamese community by eating pho soup all the time. (1:58)

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I shouldn't evenbe alive.

I'll eat, like,a big bowl of pho

and follow it upwith sugar-free Red Bull

'cause I don't careabout myself.

For those of you--

if you don't knowwhat pho is,

it's a Vietnamese soupthat answers the question,

"What happenswhen a former child soldier

pours hot rainwaterover fish nightmares?"

It's delicious,and I can't stop eating it.

That's what happens.That's what happens.

And for those of youthat know what it is,

you thinkI'm saying it wrong.

It's spelled P-H-Oand people are like,

"It's pronounced 'fuh,'"and they get all upset.

"It's pronounced 'fuh.'"

I don't care.

I'm already eating it.What more do you want from me?

I'm guaranteeingthere's nobody

in Saigon right now going,

"It's pronounced'meatball sandwich,'

don't be culturallyinsensitive."

So I'm going to continue tosupport the Vietnamese community

by eating pho all the time

instead of just correctingpeople's pronunciation of it.

[cheers and applause]

You think about thatwhen you crash

your fixed-gear bicycleon the way home.

[cheers and applause]

I rally against hipsters.I shouldn't.

If--If you're a hip--that's fine.

Be a hipster.It's okay. You're 22.

You're supposed to bean ass[bleep].

Just don't getso embedded in it

that you become, like,hipster Serpico.

That you don't know--

Then all of a sudden,you're 26,

you got, like,a Golden Girls neck tattoo,

and you're on a unicycle.

And somebody's like,"What do you really like?"

You're like,"I don't even know anymore!"

You know, don't--Don't become so entrenched

that you forgot thatyou're a human being in 2012.

[cheers and applause]