Hari Kondabolu - Weezer Mosh Pit

Hari Kondabolu, Mark Normand, Ben Kronberg, Wyatt Cenac Season 3, Ep 1 07/20/2012 Views: 22,699

Hari Kondabolu went to the Weezer concert to rock. (2:49)

MY FAVORITE BANDGROWING UP WAS WEEZER.

YEAH.

(cheers and applause)

I LOVED THAT BAND.

I LOVED THAT BAND DESPITE TWO,THREE, FOUR CRAPPY RECORDS

IN A ROW.

I FORGAVE THAT BANDBECAUSE THEY WERE MY CHILDHOOD,

AND I WENT TO A WEEZER CONCERTA COUPLE OF YEARS AGO

EXCITED TO HEAR THE OLD HITS.

I GET THERE.

THE USHER COMES UP TO MEAND HE SAYS,

"SIR, THE PARENTS SECTION'SUPSTAIRS."

PARENTS SECTION?

NO.

(laughter and applause)

I CAME TO ROCK.

YOU TAKE ME TO THE PIT.

NOW, A MOSH PITAT A WEEZER CONCERT

IS DIFFERENT THAN OTHERMOSH PITS, RIGHT?

A MOSH PIT AT A WEEZER CONCERTIS BASICALLY

NERDS BUMPING INTO EACH OTHERAND APOLOGIZING.

"I'M SORRY,I DIDN'T MEAN TO RUIN

'ONLY IN DREAMS' FOR YOU.

YES, I LOST MY VIRGINITYTO THAT SONG AS WELL,"

WHICH IS A LIE.

THEY'RE BOTH VIRGINS.

SO I GO DOWN TO THE PIT,I GO DOWN TO THE PIT.

I'M EXCITED TO BE THERE,AND WHEN I GET THERE

I REALIZE EVERYONEIS STARING AT ME.

WHY?

'CAUSE THEY'RE ALL14 YEARS OLD.

SOMEHOW WEEZER'S DEMOGRAPHICHAS NOT CHANGED IN 15 YEARS.

THEY'RE STILL14- TO 17-YEAR-OLDS.

THEY'RE ALL STARING AT ME AS IFI'M THE CREEPY OLD DUDE.

THE CREEPY OLD DUDEAT A WEEZER CONCERT AT 27.

IT FELT TERRIBLE, AND THENI STARTED THINKING ABOUT IT.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I'M NOT THE CREEPY OLD DUDEIN THIS SITUATION.

WEEZER ARE THE CREEPY OLD DUDESIN THIS SITUATION.

(laughter and applause)

THEY'RE 40-YEAR-OLD MENWHO ARE MAKING MUSIC

THAT SOMEHOW TEENAGERSCAN RELATE TO.

ISN'T THAT A BIT STRANGE?

"OH, LIFE IS HARD.

GIRLS DON'T LIKE ME.

HIGH SCHOOL IS WEIRD."

OF COURSE, IT'S WEIRD,YOU'RE 40.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

DON'T YOU HATE WHEN YOU HAVEAN AMAZING SHOW,

AND YOU CAN'T WAIT TO HANG OUTWITH THAT 16-YEAR-OLD GIRL

YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH,AND SHE'S ALL LIKE,

"AREN'TYOU MY DAD'S FRIEND?"

AND THAT'S WEEZER.

LET'S BE HONEST, AUDIENCE,

THE END OF THAT JOKE,IT WAS DISAPPOINTING.

IT'S NOT--YOU LAUGHEDBECAUSE YOU WERE TOLD TO,

BUT LIKE IT'S NOT UH...

THE END OF THAT JOKEWASN'T PARTICULARLY GOOD.

I REALIZE THAT,

LIKE, YOU KNOW, IT STARTED OUTKIND OF--KIND OF FUNNY.

IT HAD A COUPLEOF NICE BIG PUNCH LINES

AT THE BEGINNING OF THE JOKE,

AND THEN IT PLATEAUEDFOR A WHILE,

REALLY BUILDING OFF THE MOMENTUMFROM THE EARLY PART OF THE JOKE,

AND THEN THE END, LIKE,WAS REALLY DISAPPOINTING,

AND YOU MAY WONDERWHY I DID THAT.

I'LL TELL YOU WHY.

I WANTED TO WRITEA JOKE THAT ECHOED

THE TRAJECTORYOF WEEZER'S CAREER.