Bobby Bottleservice - Freaky Friday Date Night U.S.A.

  • Season 2 , Ep 6
  • 02/18/2014
  • Views: 11,526

Peter Paparazzo discovers that one of the other gigolos in the house has been harboring a surprisingly respectable secret, and Bobby and Farley's date erupts in turmoil. (3:23)

- WELCOME TO OUR HUMBLEWHOREHOUSE ABODE.

- YO, WHAT ARE YOU DOINGIN HERE?

- OH, HEY.

WEREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BEON A DATE?

- THAT'S RIGHT.

I GOT A DATEWITH A MODEL,

AN ARCHITECTURAL MODEL.

- OH, COOL.

THESE GUYS, I TOLD THEM THEYCOULDN'T HAVE SEX IN THE HOUSE,

AND THEN IT BECAMEFORBIDDEN FRUIT, SO...

- THESE MODELSARE MY FORBIDDEN FRUIT.

I WANNA BE AN ARCHITECT, MAN.- THAT'S COOL, MAN.

I'M GLAD YOU'RE PASSIONATEABOUT SOMETHING

BESIDES JACKHAMMER[bleep] GIRLS.

- I DON'T TELL NOBODYTHAT [bleep].

I CAN'T TAKE THE PRANKSAND THE TEASING.

- I'LL NEVER LETANYONE KNOW

YOUR TOTALLYRESPECTABLE SECRET.

- 'CAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT'S GONNAHAPPEN IF THEY FIND OUT.

- YEAH.

YOU'LL GET FIREDFROM BEING A WHORE

AND INSTEAD HAVE TO PURSUEA CAREER IN ARCHITECTURE?

- IT'S HARD TO LOOKAT THIS BAKED POTATO

WHEN I GOT SUCH A SWEET POTATOIN FRONT OF ME.

[both chuckle]

- YOU'RE FUNNY STILL.THAT'S GOOD.

- THE DATE WAS OFFTO A GREAT START.

- THANKS FOR TAKING ME OUT.

- NAH, THANK YOUFOR TAKING ME OUT.

[both laugh]

I FEEL LIKE IMPLICITLY,YOU UNDERSTAND ME...

- UH-HUH.

- BECAUSE, LIKE,YOU'RE ON THE SAME LEVEL.

- WAIT, SAY THAT AGAIN.

- OTHER PEOPLE AREN'TON THE SAME LEVEL.

- YEAH. CAN I ASK YOUA QUESTION?

- YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHINGYOU WANT.

- DO YOU DATE ME TONIGHTFOR MONEY LIKE WE DISCUSSED?

- I'M SORRY, WHAT?

- LIKE, NOT TO MESS UPYOUR DINNER

OR, LIKE, THE VIBEOF WHAT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW,

BUT YOU DEFINITELY DIDSTRAIGHT-UP OFFER

TO PAY ME FOR SEX.

- NO.

- AND DINNER'S INCLUDED.

- SWEETHEART, LET ME TELL YOU

HOW IT'S GONNA GO DOWNRIGHT NOW, OKAY?

I'M A GIGOLO NOW.

I LIVE INA GIGOLO HOUSE

WITH A NUMBEROF OTHER COOL DUDES, OKAY?

IT'S DATE NIGHT,USA TONIGHT.

I DECIDEDTHAT I WOULD GRANT YOU

WITH MY PERMISSIONTO BE THE GIRL

THAT WOULD PAY ME VERY MUCHFOR SEX TONIGHT

BECAUSE I, MY FRIEND,AM A GIGOLO.

- THEN I'M A GIGOLOTOO, BOBBY.

- PSSH.

YOU'RE NOT A GIGOLO.

FARLEY, YOU'RE A PROSTITUTE.

- [laughs]

AH, HA, HA.

SAY THAT [bleep] AGAIN.- YOU'RE A PROSTITUTE.

- WHAT THE [bleep], MAN?I CAN'T TAKE IT.

YOU DON'T GET IT, STUPID.

NO, I WAS NOT SATISFIEDWITH BOBBY'S SO-CALLED SERVICES.

STICK TO WHATYOU DO BEST:

HANGING OUTWITH YOUR MOM.

- OH.OOH.

MM.[groans]

- WHAT...THE...[bleep]?

PETER, I SAIDNO [bleep]ING IN THE HOUSE.

- CHILL OUT, EAGLE WING.

- HAMMER, WHAT AREYOU DOING THERE?

AND WHAT ARE YOU PLAYINGWITH, TOYS?

- SHH.- YOU'RE GONNA SHUSH ME?

- GOOD-BYE. I'M MOVING OUTTO PURSUE MY PASSION.

I HOPE THAT ONE DAYYOU ALL LOOK AROUND

AND REALIZE YOU'RE HAVING SEXIN A HOUSE THAT I BUILT.

LOOK OUT, WORLD.HERE COME THE HAMMER.

- FINE, YOU'LL BE BACK!

YOU'LL BE BACK, HAMMER!

- WHAT ARE YOU DOING,EAGLE WING?

WE JUST LOSTAN AMAZING GIGOLO.

YOU KNOW WHY?'CAUSE OF YOUR TEASIN'.

I MEAN, WHO DIED AND MADE YOUTHE KING OF GIGOLO HOUSE?

- IF YOU GOT A PROBLEMWITH WHO'S IN CHARGE

OF THIS HOUSE,YOU CAN TAKE IT UP WITH ME.

I AM IN THE BEDROOMAT THE TOP OF THE STAIRS.

- OH, I KNOWWHERE YOUR BEDROOM IS

'CAUSE IT SMELLS LIKECLOWN MAKEUP AND SPAGHETTI.

- NOT TONIGHTIT DOESN'T, BRO,

BECAUSE JUST LIKEMY FINGERS,

IT SMELLS LIKEYOUR MOM'S [bleep].

- [inhales]

- YEAH.- NO!

- [laughs]

GIGOLO AUDITIONS TOMORROW.

SPREAD THE WORD.

- ONE TIME WHEN I WASIN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL,

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