Doug Mellard - ADD

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Doug Mellard's ADD would probably make him very bad at killing people. (1:27)

Uh, tear.

Not really.

Uh, my A-D-D isreally bad though.

Like it's, it's hard, uh,with stuff like this going on.

And my A-D-D is thereason I don't think

I'd be very goodat killing people.

You know, I don't think I'dbe a very good murderer.

It's not because I don't thinkthat I could kill somebody.

I just don't think I'd be ableto get away with it, you know,

because my A-D-D is so bad.

Cause, like, let'ssay, hypothetically

speaking for just a moment,that I kill a family.

And now I have to escapewhen they have a trampoline.

I am screwed, youknow what I mean?

If you didn't get that,uh, you have A-D-D

and you weren'tpaying attention.

Or you're that guy,who's just dumb.


I, uh, mysister-in-law's Catholic.

She went to Catholicschool and in high school,

her mascot was the Holy Spirit.

That's not the joke part.

That's the truth.

But, uh, I laughedin her face when

I heard it the firsttime, too, you know.

But what's reallyfunny to think about

is imagine you're the otherteam playing the Holy Spirit.

And you're down a fewpoints by halftime.

And your coach in the lockerroom having to give you

that pep talk, like, "Whoare we going to crush?

The Holy Spirit."

That is messed up.

You're going to hell.


Jesus is on their side.

He's pretty good.

I'm pretty good with the ladies.

I think I'm good enoughto where someday maybe I'd

be good enough to, uh,be the next Ted Bundy.

I don't know.

Um, not so much?

All right.