Wayne Federman - Concerts

  • Season 7 , Ep 25
  • 08/14/2003
  • Views: 1,466

It's better to watch K.I.S.S. than to hear them. (2:10)

'KISS' IN CONCERT.

AND I WILL TELL YOU RIGHT FROM

THE START-- HONESTLY--

I AM NOT IN THE KISS ARMY,

ALTHOUGH I WAS DRAFTED

BY THE KISS ARMY BUT I MANAGED

TO INSTEAD SIGN UP FOR THE

GRAND FUNK RAILROAD AIR NATIONAL

GUARD TO AVOID SERVICE IN THE

ARMY.

SO I GO TO THE L.A. FORUM

TO WATCH KISS, WHICH IS--

IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.

YOU GET IN AND THEY GIVE YOU

3-D GLASSES.

SOMEONE SHOULD TELL THEM THAT

THEY ALREADY ARE IN 3-D.

[LAUGHTER]

I KNOW THEY THINK THEY'RE

CARTOONS OR SUPERHEROES,

BUT WE CAN ALL DO THIS.

WE CAN ALL--

WE CAN DO IT.

AND THEN AS THE CONCERT UNFOLDS

I REALIZE THIS ISN'T REALLY

A CONCERT, THIS IS MORE

OF A MAGIC SHOW.

THAT EVERYTHING THEY DO,

THE PYROTECHNICS, THE SMOKES,

THE COSTUMES, IS DESIGNED TO

DISTRACT YOU FROM THEIR SET LIST

'CAUSE THEIR MUSIC IS SO

MARGINAL.

LIKE, "HEY, YOU DON'T LIKE THIS

SONG?

WHAT ABOUT NOW, BLOOD'S COMING

OUT OF MY MOUTH?"

[LAUGHTER]

YEAH, WE DO LIKE IT NOW.

[APPLAUSE]

"THIS GUITAR SOLO SUCKS?

WELL, HOW 'BOUT NOW?

A ROCKET JUST LAUNCHED OUT OF

THE NECK OF THE GUITAR."

MY FAVORITE CONCERT I EVER

WENT TO WAS PINK FLOYD.

[CHEERS, WHISTLES, APPLAUSE]

BUT I WILL SAY THIS:

THAT SHOW WAS DESIGNED,

PRODUCED, CREATED FOR DRUGGIES,

FOR PEOPLE ON DRUGS.

AND I WISH THEY WOULD HAVE JUST

BEEN HONEST AND SAID RIGHT ON

THE TICKET, "TO TRULY ENJOY

THE PINK FLOYD MULTIMEDIA

EXPERIENCE, THE BAND RECOMMENDS

THE FOLLOWING HALLUCINOGENIC

MEDICATIONS."

[LAUGHTER]

'CAUSE I LIKED THE SHOW,

BUT THE PEOPLE AROUND ME

ENJOYED IT ON A DIFFERENT LEVEL

THAN I DID.

AT ONE POINT, A GIANT PIG COMES

FLOATING OUT OVER THE AUDIENCE.

I'M LIKE, "WHAT IS THIS,

A HOT DOG AD?"

THE PEOPLE AROUND ME ARE LIKE,

"THE PIG, IT'S COMING."

THEY'RE DIVING UNDER CHAIRS.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I'M LIKE "EXCUSE ME,

I CAN CLEARLY SEE THE WIRES.

I CAN SEE THE WIRES."

[APPLAUSE]

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