SORRY.

DO YOU EVER WEAR A BATHING SUIT

BECAUSE YOU RAN OUT OF CLEANUNDERWEAR?

BUNCHING UP HAPPENING HERE.

C'MON.

I'M A MESS.

I DID THAT ON A DATE ONCE.

I WAS WEARING A BATHING SUITUNDER MY PANTS BECAUSE I DIDN'T

DO LAUNDRY.

SHE WOULDN'T HAVE KNOWN EXCEPTI HAD THAT WHITE STRING FLAPPING

OUTSIDE OF MY FLY.

SHE'S LIKE, "WHAT DO YOU HAVE ATAMPON IN THERE?"

WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOU.

(LAUGHTER)I'M EMBARRASSED FOR 80%

OF MY LIFE.

AND I HATE IT.

YOU EVER GET EMBARRASSEDFOR LIKE A LITTLE THING BUT YOU

KINDA WANNA KILL YOURSELF?

LIKE ONE TIME, YOU KNOW WHEN YOUGET IN AN ELEVATOR YOU GO TO

PRESS YOUR FLOOR BUTTON AND IT'SALREADY BEEN PRESSED?

IT'S LIT UP.

YOU KNOW THAT THEY ALL SAW YOURFINGER GO THERE AND THEN STOP.

THAT'S ONE OF THOSE MOMENTSWHERE YOU MAKE THAT NOISE WHERE

YOU DON'T ACTUALLY MAKE WORDS.

(MUMBLING)(LAUGHTER)

I HATE THAT.

JUST THOSE LITTLE THINGS.

THE OTHER DAY THIS GUY ASKED METHE TIME.

I HATE THAT.

I HATE WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME THETIME ON THE STREET.

SOMETHING HAPPENS TO ME,I JUST PANIC.

I CAN'T READ MY WATCH.

WHEN I'M ALONE, I'M GREAT ATREADING MY WATCH,

(APPLAUSE)BUT WHEN SOMEBODY ASKS ME

I JUST HAVE THIS ANXIETY ATTACKAND I JUST CAN'T MAKE IT OUT.

"YOU HAVE THE TIME?""YEAH, I GGG... I...

IT'S LIKE THIS."

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)I ALWAYS END UP SAYING SOMETHING

USELESS LIKE, "IT'S TWENTY OF9:40".

YOU KNOW WHAT I DO NOW WHENPEOPLE ASK ME?

THEY'RE LIKE, "DO YOU HAVE THETIME?"

I JUST GO, "YEAH."

(HORN NOISES)'CAUSE THEN THEY MOVE ON.