Owen Benjamin - Relationships Are Work

  • Season 14 , Ep 3
  • 01/11/2010
  • Views: 64,303

In Owen Benjamin's opinion, the biggest thing about a relationship is the ability to fight. (2:57)

BUT I TYPICALLY LIKE THEM.

BUT THEY'RE A LOT OF WORK, MAN.

WHO HERE IS IN A RELATIONSHIP?MAKE SOME NOISE.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]A FEW PEOPLE?

SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE...

[ LAUGHTER ]

THE BIGGEST THING ABOUTA RELATIONSHIP IN MY OPINION

IS THE ABILITY TO FIGHT,YOU KNOW?

'CAUSE EVERYONE FIGHTS.

DON'T YOU HATE THOSE COUPLESTHAT NEVER FIGHT?

THEY'RE LIKE,"NO, WE NEVER FIGHT."

[ GIGGLES ]

[ LAUGHTER ]

THEY JUST HAVE "PROZAC"WRITTEN ON THEIR FOREHEADS.

YOU'RE LIKE,"WHOA, THAT'S WEIRD."

LIKE, I GREW UP IN LIKE A --

YOU KNOW, AN IRISH-CATHOLIC,CZECH-JEWISH MIX,

LIKE WEIRD, FIGHTY FAMILY,YOU KNOW?

AND IT'S LIKE --

I-I THINK THE ABILITY TO FIGHTWITH YOUR PARTNER IS NECESSARY,

'CAUSE SOME PEOPLE FIGHT BADLY.

BUT IF YOU FIGHT WELL,IT'S COOL, YOU KNOW?

AND I THINK THE BIG FIGHTSARE USUALLY THE DUDE'S FAULT.

AND IT IS, THOUGH.

IT'S USUALLY THE BIG PROBLEMS,LIKE, "WHY ARE WE BANKRUPT?"

[ LAUGHTER ]

"SORRY."

[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ LAUGHTER ]

BUT THE LITTLE FIGHTS,THE DAILY FIGHTS,

THE FIGHTSTHAT I CONSIDER MEANINGLESS --

UH, SORRY, LADIES, BUT I DO.

I THINK IT'S BECAUSE WOMEN WATCHSO MANY, LIKE, DAYTIME TV

AND "SEX AND THE CITY,""BRIDEZILLA," YOU KNOW?

LIKE ALL THAT STUFF, "NIP/TUCK,"WHATEVER IT IS YOU'RE WATCHING,

THAT THEY START BELIEVINGTHAT LIFE IS VERY DRAMATIC.

LIKE, ENTERTAINMENTTHAT'S GEARED TOWARDS WOMEN

IS VERY DRAMATIC.

EVERY SCENE IS A DRAMA.YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

AND LIFE ISN'T HARD.IT'S VERY EASY.

YOU EAT, YOU SLEEP, YOU DO IT.

AND THAT'S IT.

IT'S LIKE AT ANY GIVEN TIME,

THIS MUSIC IS PLAYINGIN A WOMAN'S HEAD.

READY?

[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND THEY'RE NOT ALWAYSLIKE THAT.

WOMEN AREN'T ALWAYS LIKE THAT.

JUST IF YOU CATCH THEMIN THE WRONG MOOD,

THEY'RE LIKE THAT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND THE LITTLEST TALKCAN GO SO SOUTH, YOU KNOW?

SHE'D BE LIKE, "OWEN."

I'D BE LIKE, "YO."

SHE'S LIKE, "ARE YOU HUNGRY?"

I'M LIKE, "NO."

SHE'S LIKE, "WHERE DID YOU EAT?"

[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ LAUGHTER ]

I'M LIKE, "I ATE AT WENDY'S."

SHE'S LIKE, "WENDY'S?

HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA."

[ LAUGHTER ]

"WHO THE HELL IS WENDY?!

WHO THE HELL?!"

SO THEN I TOOK A PICTUREOF THAT, AND I KEEP IT.

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