Mark's New Reality

  • Season 1 , Ep 12
  • 11/03/2010
  • Views: 11,550

While cast in multiple reality shows, Mark tries to analyze obsessive producer Clark Dungaree. (1:55)

WHAT?

WHAT'S GOING ON?

- YOU HAVE 30 SECONDSOF CONSCIOUSNESS, MARK.

SO LISTEN CAREFULLY.

BY THE TIME I'M DONE WITH YOU,

ACTUAL REALITY WILL SEEMSO MUNDANE,

YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO STOMACHYOUR REAL LIFE.

- YOU'RE--YOU'RE INSANE.

- YOU WANT INSANE?

I ONCE TOOK A CRAP IN A BAG

AND SENT IT TO A NETWORK,

AN ACTUAL BAG OF CRAP!

THEY BOOKED 24 EPISODES!

YOU WANT TO BLAME SOMEONE,MARK,

THEY CREATED THE MONSTERSTANDING IN FRONT OF YOU.

- I ALWAYS WONDERED WHERE BAG OF CRAP CAME...

FROM...

- AND...

- WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?

- REVERSE LIPOSUCTION, MARK.

YOUR PERSONALWEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY

WILL TOUCH THE HEARTSOF MILLIONS.

- LISTEN, CLARK.

AH!

YOU ARE CLEARLY HAUNTED

BY SOME SORT OFCHILDHOOD TRAUMA.

- NO TIME FOR THAT, MARK.WEIGH-IN IS IN 30 MINUTES.

- [groans]

- OKAY, LET'S GET HIM PUMPED.

AND SAVE THE FAT.

I HAVE A NEW IDEA FOR A SHOW.

I DARE YOU TO EAT THAT.

- WERE YOU BULLIED AS A CHILD?

DID YOUR FATHERWITHHOLD AFFECTION?

- WRONG, AND WRONG AGAIN, MARK.

- [sobbing] I'M SO HAPPY.

[gunfire]

- CLARK, I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME.

YOU HAVE TO TRUST ME.

I'M A SOCIAL WORKER.THIS IS WHAT I DO.

boom!

MAYBE YOU JUST HADA REALLY MUNDANE CHILDHOOD,

AND NOW YOU FEEL THE NEEDTO COMPENSATE

WITH ALL THESE OVERPRODUCEDSCENARIOS.

- MY GOD, MARK.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT ME.

I'M READY TO GO HOME NOW.

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