The Colbert Report

Give Stephen an iPhone

Season 3 • 06/27/2007

It's simple -- give Stephen an iPhone, he convinces people to buy it.

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01:55

Tony Blair's Conversion
The Colbert ReportS3

Prime Minister Tony Blair may be converting to Catholicism, according to a priest who heard it from a bishop who heard it from a cardinal who read it in the British tabloids.
06/26/2007
00:09

Sign Off - Visions of Sugarplums
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen signs off, hoping that visions of sugarplums dance in your heads -- for six months.
06/26/2007
01:54

Alpha Dog of the Week - Fred Thompson
The Colbert ReportS3

Fred Thompson's ex-girlfriends are lining up to endorse him, so Stephen is rewarding the potential presidential candidate's ability to do it Alpha-Doggie style.
06/26/2007
00:29

Intro - 6/26/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Tonight: Ton Blair meets with the Pope, the Administration considers closing Gitmo, and guest David France tells Stephen that gaydar is real.
06/26/2007
06:29

David France
The Colbert ReportS3

David France tells Stephen about the science that further supports the theory that homosexuality is genetic, but must admit that not all the science has been scienced.
06/26/2007
01:12

Christmas Presents
The Colbert ReportS3

The Mexican government is upset that the U.S. government built a fence on its side of the border. Stephen assures them it was a Christmas present.
06/26/2007
06:09

Tom Blanton
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Professional tattle-tale Tom Blanton explains to Stephen why the Freedom of Information Act is so important and what freedom is all about.
06/27/2007
05:54

Daniel Gilbert
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Daniel Gilbert talks about his new book and tells Stephen that money doesn't buy happiness, kids are a pain in the ass and marriage and religion will make you happy.
06/27/2007
05:28

Four Horsemen of the A-Pop-Calypse - Shaq
The Colbert ReportS3

Shaquille O'Neal sells-out fast-food marketing, Sinead O'Connor still hates Jesus, Harry Potter spoilers aren't so bad and the Transformers movie is not trustworthy.
06/27/2007
00:30

Intro - 6/27/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen tells the CIA how to get blood out of their clothing, tries to figure out the secrets of Harry Potter's tricks and makes author Daniel Gilbert unhappy.
06/27/2007
02:08

Give Stephen an iPhone
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen was outraged to find out that three major newspapers received iPhones before he did, so he reviewed an imaginary one and gave it zero stars.
06/27/2007
00:16

Sign Off - Going on Vacation
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen's going on vacation for two weeks, but don't get too depressed -- think of the reruns as me-runs.
06/28/2007
04:44

Colbert Platinum - Luxury Car Wrecks
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All right, billionaires, put down your diamond-encrusted diamond encruster and tune into the latest edition of Colbert Platinum.
06/28/2007
02:59

Civil Unrest in Iran
The Colbert ReportS3

The Iranian government began rationing gas to its citizens, causing long lines and riots. This is fantastic news -- Iran today is like America in the 1970s.
06/28/2007
00:34

Intro - 6/28/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Tonight: A Republican senator turns against the war, a segment for high-income viewers, and Stephen shows guest Doug Bailey his centrist finger.
06/28/2007
05:28

Doug Bailey
The Colbert ReportS3

Doug Bailey's Unity '08 party is trying to draft candidates by popular demand, including Michael Bloomberg, Tom Brokaw, and Stephen.
06/28/2007
01:45

Spot the Difference
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The New York Times ran two identical pictures of 10 Downing Street, one with Tony Blair's departure and one with Gordon Brown's arrival. Stephen plays "Spot the Difference."
06/28/2007
03:28

The Word - Profiles In Timing
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Now that his anti-war speech won't lead to any action, Senator Richard Lugar is selling the president out.
06/28/2007
00:30

Intro - 6/14/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen discusses gays in the military and how to save money on your summer vacation, and interviews Daniel Smith.
07/14/2007
00:10

Sign Off - The Land of Nod
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen is off to the Land of Nod, a nearby Indian nation with casino gambling and bars that close at six a.m.
07/14/2007
05:13

Stephen Benjamin
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen Benjamin doesn't offer Congress any better ideas on how to route gays out of the military.
07/14/2007
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