Exclusive - Road to Roast Battle: Chicago - Uncensored

Road to Roast Battle Season 1, Ep 1 07/24/2016 Views: 4,538

When Roast Battle arrives in Chicago, Ms. Pat and C.J. Sullivan roast each other, Sean Flannery takes on Kolin Bohannon, and Sean White goes head to head with Xavier Lamont. (1:45)

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(rock, hip hop music)

- We're in Chicago, thisis a big fighter town.

- Cohen, you're a great sport for

fucking letting us--

- Oh fuck off.

- These guys have chipson their shoulders.

- And Dillinger got shot right over there

and Roast Battle's getting shot right over here.

- Already looks like Jake Cutler

yelling at one of his linemen.

(audience laughs)

- It's gonna be a bloodbath.

This is gonna be Rocky one.

(bell rings)

- The only the reason why I feel bad beating you

cause I'm a Southern white male and it frankly is cliche.

(audience laughs)

- This is like Patrice versus O'Neill.

(audience screams)

- You've got the Sklar Brothers, we love those guys.

We call them everybody'sfavorite nobodys.

Because they're knownin the comedy community

but nowhere else.

- A man, when you were born, was it

vaginal, cesarean, or you just eat your way out?

(audience laughs)

- I would drink with you just so you talk about me

then I'll slap the shit outta you, dude.

- Lil Rel on TheCarmichael Show on NBC,

he's a funny dude from Chicago

and it's good to have that kind of flavor here,

a local guy.

(gun shoots)

- I'm just happy to be roasting

somebody with the same size titties as I got.

(audience laughs)

- I know I'mma take a lot of shit personal

so I wrote a lot of personal shit.

- I know it's toughbeing a woman in comedy.

You have to go through a lot of stuff.

Luckily, you never had to worry about being raped

by Bill Cosby cause theycan't deep fry a rufi.

(audience gasps)

- Deep fried rufi?

- Depp fried rufi joke, I thought that was hysterical.

- The deep fried rufi joke?

I was like oh you fat fuck, why didn't I think of that?

(laughs)

- John likes to comparehimself to George Carlin

because of hisstorytelling abilities.

I like to compare him to Carlinbecause of his alcoholism

and because I wish he were fucking dead.

(audience screams)

- I really want Colin to win just so

Moses can try to raise that hand in the air.

(laughs)

- You gotta really be able to take a joke

to live in this town.

Pretty psyched for RoastBattle Chicago tonight.