Jeff Mac - Gay Wedding Protesters

Season 1, Ep 0102 07/27/2006 Views: 1,842

Jeff Mac loves the hillbilly rednecks who protest gay marriages. (2:14)

I'm telling you right now,last week...

There is, uh...there's a baseball park

out in Illinois that is servingwhat they're calling

Baseball's Best Burger.

I don't knowif anybody heard of this.

This is a giant burger.

It's smothered in cheese,covered in bacon,

and served between twoKrispy Kreme glazed donuts.

( laughter and applause )

Yeah, and it doesn't stop there.

For an extra 50 cents,you can actually...

you can actually havea cardiologist pop out

and just punch you.

( laughter )Just right in your seventh chin.

Uh, there actually...

There is a low-carb versionof that

where, uh, insteadof the donuts, uh,

you can get it servedbetween two, uh, babies.

( laughter )

If you're into health.

Like, if that's your thing.

So, uh, I'm a huge fanof gay marriage.

He said as ifthere had been a segue

that made that not awkward.

( laughter )

No, no. I'm mostly a fan of itfor the protestors

who will show upat a gay wedding.

Uh, 'cause I find them

hilarious and adorableand ridiculous

because it's not a lot of them.

It's, like, one sortof sad, lonely,

hillbilly redneck retardstanding out in the rain

with a sign that says, like,"God hates homos"

or whatever stupid thingit says.

Um, and as a side note,maybe don't use the word retard

when you're doing a bitabout tolerance, you know?

( laughter and applause )

Who knows what you do?

When the term isretarded American.

( laughter )

Yeah. That's called sensitivity,everybody.

You look it up.

( laughter )And you're welcome.

Um, here-here's my questionfor that protestor guy, okay?

'Cause clearly he's a believer.

He's willing to stand out there

and get his mullet all dampfor the cause.

( laughter )

So this is a guy who believesthat God made everything, right?

That's fine, but he's got a sign

that says God hates stuff.

Like, why is God making stuffhe hates?

Like, constantly.

( laughter )

You know, is-is God off therereally somewhere going, like,

"Oh, boy, what the hellam I doing here?

"Oh, why would I makeanother gay guy?

"I hate these.

"Oh, this is terrible.

"Oh, my God.

I'm Almighty."

( laughter and applause )