David Alan Grier - Married Sex Vs. Single Sex

  • Season 5 , Ep 506
  • 11/09/2001
  • Views: 44,239

Married sex and single sex are two different things. (1:10)

AUDIENCE--

WE GOT A LOT OF COUPLES HERE,

RIGHT?

WE GOT SOME COUPLES OUT THERE?

I SEE YOU.

IT'S REALLY WEIRD WHEN YOU LOOK

AT COUPLES 'CAUSE THERE'S A

WHOLE DIFFERENT THING BETWEEN,

LIKE, SINGLE SEX AND MARRIED

SEX.

WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WHEN YOU'RE

SINGLE, IT FREE AND EASY,

ISN'T IT?

YOU JUST CALL UP FOR THAT

BOOTY CALL--

"HEY, GIRL.

WHAT'S UP?

I KNOW IT'S 3 A.M., BABY,

I JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW

I'M COMIN' OVER TO TAP THAT

ASS."

(LAUGHTER)

LIKE, "OKIE DOKIE."

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

NICE.

BUT MARRIED SEX IS A WHOLE

DIFFERENT THANG.

WHEN YOU MARRIED AND YOU WANT TO

HAVE SEX, YOU GOT TO PLAN AHEAD.

YOU GOT TO STRATEGIZE.

YOU GOT TO KNOW WHEN TO STRIKE.

YOU GOT TO HAVE MAPS AND

EVERYTHING.

PLOTTING IT OUT.

YOU GOT TO HIT YOUR WIFE

UNDER THE COVER OF DARKNESS.

WHEN SHE'S SLEEPING, TIRED,

WEAK...

PRE-OCCUPIED...

DROOLING ON THE PILLOW...

YOU GOT TO SNEAK UP FROM BEHIND

AND SNATCH HER QUICK!

AND YOU STILL MAY NOT GET NONE.

(LAUGHTER AND CHEERING)

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