Brian Kiley - Family

  • Season 10 , Ep 19
  • 04/20/2006
  • Views: 2,214

When Brian was a kid, his aunt always called him by his brother's name. (1:37)

SO I NEVER HAD TO MOW THE LAWN OR SHOVEL SNOW.

PLUS, YOU LEARN A LOTWHEN YOU LIVE IN A MOBILE HOME.

DID YOU KNOW THE AVERAGE JEHOVAH WITNESS CAN RUN 35 MILES AN HOUR?

- [LAUGHTER] - THEY'RE AMAZING.

I LOVE THE NORTHEAST, THOUGH.

I GOT IN A BIZARRE SKIING ACCIDENT LAST WINTER. I COLLIDED WITH THIS GUY--

- ON HIS NORDIC TRACK... - [LAUGHTER]

- STAYING AT A FRIEND'S HOUSE. - [LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

I LIKE JUST ABOUT EVERY SPORT.

I WENT HUNTING FOR THE FIRST TIME. I SHOT AN ELK.

I FELT REALLY BAD AT FIRST. BUT THE GUY WAS WEARING

- A PLAID LEISURE SUIT SO... - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

MY UNCLE'S AN ELK, YOU KNOW.

I'M NOT TOO CRAZY ABOUT MY RELATIVES.

AND I LOVE MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY.

BUT DON'T YOU LOOK AT YOUR RELATIVES,

YOU CAN'T BELIEVEYOU'RE ACTUALLY RELATED TO THESE PEOPLE?

I GIVE BLOOD FOUR TIMES A YEARJUST SO I'M LESS AND LESS

- RELATED TO THESE PEOPLE. - [LAUGHTER]

NOT SURE IT WORKS LIKE THAT.

WHEN I WAS A KID, I HAD THIS ONE AUNT.

SHE USED TO ALWAYS CALL ME BY MY BROTHER'S NAME.

I MEAN, A MILLION TIMES,EVERY TIME I SAW HER.

AND FINALLY I JUST SNAPPED. I SAID, "YOU ARE THE BIGGEST,

SIMPLETON IDIOT PINHEAD I HAVE EVER MET."

SHE GOT ALL UPSET, CALLED MY PARENTS, TOLD ON ME.

MY BROTHER GOT SCREWED.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

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