Lenny Clarke - Proud to Be an American

  • Season 6 , Ep 5
  • 05/19/2002
  • Views: 2,466

Lenny Clarke got in a cab and gave the guy $20 to move over so he could drive. (1:49)

WE'RE TREATING THESE TALIBAN

TYPES TOO BAD AND YET THEY'RE

ON THE BEACH IN CUBA WHILE IT'S

FREEZING OVER THERE IN

AFGHANISTAN.

THAT LOOKS LIKE GOOD DEAL.

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO GO TO CUBA

BUT I CAN'T BECAUSE I'M AN

AMERICAN.

I MEAN, I'M AN AMERICAN,

I'M PROUD TO BE AND AMERICAN.

YOU KNOW, WE HAD A TRAGEDY LAST

YEAR CAUSED BY THESE FILTHY

TALIBAN TYPES.

AND, I MEAN, YOU KNOW WE'RE NOT

SUPPOSED TO TALK ABOUT IT.

WELL, THE HELL WITH IT.

I'M GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT

'CAUSE I'M MAD AS HELL.

AND I THINK THESE GUYS SHOULD BE

PUNISHED.

I MEAN, THINK ABOUT IT.

THEY'RE NOT THE BRIGHTEST ONES

IN THE BUNCH.

THEY TRIED TO SEND US ANTHRAX

TO HURT US.

THEY TRIED TO SEND IT AND I KNEW

THEY WERE STUPID 'CAUSE THEY

SENT IT THROUGH THE MAIL.

DO THESE GUY REALIZE WHO THEY'RE

MESSING WITH?

THE UNITED STATES POSTAL

SERVICE.

(LAUGHTER INTO APPLAUSE)

THESE GUYS WILL KILL EACH OTHER

OVER A HOLIDAY.

YOU RAISE THE PRICE OF STAMPS

SOMEONE IS GOING DOWN.

I MEAN, THINK ABOUT IT.

IF THEY EVER FIND OUT WHERE

THOSE CAVES ARE, THEY'LL FILL

THOSE CAVES WITH JUNK MAIL.

THEY'LL BE UP THEIR ASS SWIMMING

IN COUPONS.

GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY.

I MEAN, I GET SO SICK ABOUT IT,

FOLKS, BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO

GO TO WAR.

DO YOU PEOPLE WANT TO GO TO WAR?

NO, OF COURSE NOT.

YOU WORKED ALL WEEK; YOU'RE

TIRED.

YOU DON'T HAVE TIME TO BE

RUNNING AROUND THE WORLD

FIGHTING ALL SORTS OF STRANGE

FOREIGN PEOPLE.

YOU WANT TO DO THAT JUMP IN A

CAB.

(LAUGHTER)

TELL ME I'M WRONG.

I GOT IN A CAB TO COME DOWN

HERE.

I SAID, "TAKE ME TO DOWN

TO HUDSON THEATRE."

THE GUY GOES (MUMBLES)

"YEAH, YEAH, HUDSON THEATRE."

(MUMBLING CONTINUES)

I SAID, "NEVER MIND,

HERE'S 20 BUCKS.

YOU SIT THERE I'LL DRIVE."

(LAUGHTER AND APPL

Loading...