Extended - Chris D'Elia - Drunk Drive-Through

Chris D'Elia: White Male. Black Comic. Season 1, Ep 101 11/20/2013 Views: 72,570

Chris D'Elia is never more annoyed than when he is at the drive-through with drunken passengers. (1:33)

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That's all my friends--they get drunk.

And then at theend of the night,

they want to get fast food.

That's a move, man.

But I'm never more annoyed thanwhen I'm at the drive-through

and there's drunk peoplein the backseat, right?

They're so annoying, man, 'causethey always-- they always--

they always order better thanyou, you know what I mean?

Like, first of all, it's easy.

I got it.

Second of all, I'm thesober one, so you relax, OK?

There's always somebodyin the back just like--

(AS DRUNKARD) Hey, give me a 7.

I want a 7!

I want a-- Tom, tellthat guy I want a 7.

Tell the guy.

Hey, you, you, tell him totell the guy I want a 7.

(AS HIMSELF) Shut up.

Shut up.

(AS DRUNKARD) What?

Why would I be quiet?

Why?

You know what?

Maybe if I didn't wanta 7, then I'd be like--

But I do.

[retches]

I do.

I want a 7.

(AS HIMSELF) Shh, be quiet.

(AS DRUNKARD) Why?

(AS HIMSELF) Ialready ordered the 7.

If you order the 7, thenwe're going to get two 7s.

I don't want two 7s.

(AS DRUNKARD) Uh, Idon't want two 7s.

I want one 7, OK?

Maybe if I wanted two7s, I would get a 14, OK?

But I don't.

[retches]

I don't want that.

You do the math.

I don't want that.

I want a 7!

(AS HIMSELF) Be quiet.

You're not even atthe drive-through yet.

You're at a red lighton Canal Street.