I have a girlfriend now.
I have a girlfriend nowand we're getting--
we're pretty farinto the relationship,
so we're doing, like, very cute,couple-y things all the time.
We went to a concertthe other night,
and they had a photo booth,
and so you got four photosin the photo booth.
So we did smiling photo,
and then we didgoofy-face photo,
and then we didkissing photo,
and then, uh,
doggy-style,and then, um...
I lost my virginityin college
on Halloween nightwhile watching a movie.
And I've learned since thenthat there's no good movie
to have onin the background of sex.
Um, I lost my virginityon a Halloween night
while watching the movie"Hocus Pocus."
Um, "Hocus Pocus" is a movieabout three witches
starring Bette Midler,Sarah Jessica Parker,
and, uh, Kathy Najimyin the role of a lifetime.
And a lot of guys cumtoo quickly
the first time they have sex,
I lasted 45 minutes outof pure stress and anxiety.
I ended up cummingwhen Bette Midler was singing
a Broadway version of"I Put a Spell On You."
Really weird--really weird night.
I did, uh--I just watchedthat movie again recently.
No joke, two weeks ago,
for the first timesince that night.
And two things happened:one, I realized, great movie.
Still totally holds up.
Very funny, very self-aware.
And two is thatI immediately got rock hard
and camewhen it started--um...