Darrell Hammond - It Was Fun

  • Season 4 , Ep 1
  • 12/03/2000
  • Views: 4,845

James Bond gives Bill Clinton full marks. (3:04)

IT'S A GOOD JOB.

YOU GET TO DO A LOT OF THINGSYOU DON'T DESERVE TO DO.

LIKE, I GOT TO GO TO THE OVALOFFICE A COUPLE-- THREE TIMES,

AND HANG OUT THERE AT THEFRIGGIN' OVAL OFFICE, MAN.

AND IT'S WEIRD.

YOU'RE IN THE OVAL OFFICE,YOU THINK,

YOU THINK YOU'RE GONNA BEPATRIOTIC, BUT YOU'RE NOT.

YOU JUST WANT TO USETHE PHONE, Y'KNOW,

AND CALL SOMEBODY THATYOU KNOW HAS CALLER I.D.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN ?

AND YOU KNOW,THIS CLINTON,

IF NOTHING ELSE,YOU HAVE TO SAY

THAT PRESIDENT CLINTON,IT WAS FUN.

IT WAS FUN WITH HIM.

( applause )

WELL...

HE HAD A FUNPRESIDENCY.

I MEAN, EVERY DAYHE'S IN ANOTHER JAM.

AND NOT A FENDER BENDEREITHER.

THE KIND OF STUFF THATJAMES BOND CAN'T GET OUT OF.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN ?

CAUGHT ON CAMERA LYING--LYING ON CAMERA !

HOW DOES HEGET OUT OF IT ?

HE DEBATES THE MEANINGOF THE WORD "IS."

THAT'S CLASSY.

Y'KNOW, EVEN JAMES BONDWOULD BE LIKE--

( "Sean Connery" )"WELL... FULL MARKS, LAD.

NORMALLY I HAVE TOUSE A JET PACK."

AND AS GREATAS THE DRAMA WAS

WHEN HE WENT ON TV AND SAID,"I MISLED YOU, I DID--"

HE APOLOGIZED TO US.

IF I WAS HIM, I WOULDN'THAVE GONE ON AND SAID,

"I MISLED YOU,I DEEPLY REGRET IT."

I'D HAVE GONE ONTELEVISION AND SAID...

( "Clinton" )"UH... I UH...

I WANNA SPEAK TO JUST THE MENIN THE AUDIENCE FOR A SECOND."

"UH, FELLAS...Y'ALL KNOW MY WIFE.

"OKAY, THAT'S NUMBER ONE.

"BUT, FELLAS, MY WIFELETS ME DO THESE THINGS.

"I WANT YOU TO PUT YOURSELFIN MY SHOES.

"A 20-YEAR-OLD INTERN,BIG OL' BOOBIES...

"YOUR WIFE SAYS,'HEY, GO AHEAD.'

"WHAT WOULD YOU DO ?

"I THINK YOU KNOWTHE ANSWER.

"I THINK I DO, TOO.

"NOW, NOW I'D LIKETO SPEAK TO

"JUST THE WOMENIN THE AUDIENCE.

"LADIES...

"I LIVE AT1600 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE.

"HA-HA !

RING THE NIGHT BELL."

CLINTON'S WHACKED, MAN,THIS GUY IS DANGEROUS.

HE'S THE KIND OF GUYTHAT CAN SAY TO A WOMANAND GET AWAY WITH IT,

"Y'KNOW, IF YOU'D ONLYTAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF

"AND LET ME SEEYOU NAKED...

"THERE WOULD BENO MORE RACISM.

LET FREEDOM RING."

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