Uber just releaseda controversial new set
of community guidelinesthat emphatically clarify,
no sex in Ubers... at all!
-Oh. Boo... ber.-(booing continues)
-(laughter)-Uh... but no. No sex
in Ubers,not even with the drivers.
How are passengers supposedto control themselves?
Personally, I find nothingsexier than being in the back
of a dirty Prius and noddingpolitely
while hearing about someone'sband that's about to take off.
-(laughter)-Uh, I see this as a challenge.
Comedians, what's a lineyou could use on an Uber driver
to make them breaktheir no-sex oath?
I'll give you a tipfor your tip.
HARDWICK:All right, points.
(laughter, groaning, applause)
-Morgan.-I would say
like, "Hey, this water bottledoesn't fit in the cup holder."
And then when he turns around,it be sticking out my butt.
-HARDWICK: All right, points.-(laughter)
(applause and cheering)
Uh, I know it's not allowed,
but would you liketo have sex with me?
HARDWICK: Yeah, all right.Points. -(laughter)