The Colbert Report
Yahweh or No Way - The Super Bowl
Season 5 • 02/04/2009
Stephen determines which team God was pulling for in the Super Bowl.
The Colbert ReportS5 Henry Louis Gates, Jr.
Henry Louis Gates, Jr. says Abraham Lincoln was always against slavery, but he wasn't a fan of black people.
The Colbert ReportS5 All the Show We Have Time For
Fortunately, it's also all the time we have show for.
The Colbert ReportS5 Colbert Platinum - Ass-Covering Edition
If you really want to convince people you're dead, you need to actually die.
The Colbert ReportS5 Tom Daschle Steps Down
If this were the Bush administration, Tom Daschle would have never stepped down -- not without a medal of freedom.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Word - Army of One
If Republicans do what Rush Limbaugh says, they'll get the only vote that matters: his.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 2/3/09
Republicans choose a new leader. Don't worry -- they're the same old ideas.
The Colbert ReportS5 Who's Not Honoring Me Now? - The Newberry Awards
Al Gore has already won an Oscar, an Emmy, a Nobel Prize and the 2000 presidential election -- he doesn't need a Grammy.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 2/4/09
Pope Benedict reinstates a Holocaust-denying bishop. Frankly, Stephen is skeptical of the evidence that he actually reinstated him.
The Colbert ReportS5 Tell Your Friends
If you didn't like what you saw, Stephen will tell your enemies.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stephen Verbally Thrashes Steve Martin
Stephen explodes after Steve Martin walks through his eyeline.
The Colbert ReportS5 Yahweh or No Way - The Super Bowl
God helping both teams in a football game would be as impossible as loving both Christians and Muslims.
The Colbert ReportS5 Keep Your Friends Close
You can keep your enemies closer by hating yourself.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 2/5/09
What's in the stimulus package? Stephen's guessing high-fructose corn syrup because that stuff is in everything.
The Colbert ReportS5 Stelephant Colbert the Elephant Seal
Stephen has a hideous elephant seal named after him.
The Colbert ReportS5 Alpha Dog of the Week - Boy Scouts of America
The Boy Scouts of America proudly raise the Scout sign and tell their own conservation code to read between the lines.
The Colbert ReportS5 Jonah Lehrer
Jonah Lehrer talks about finding a balance between the rational and the emotional in decision-making.
The Colbert ReportS5 Economic Stimulus Bill - James Surowiecki
James Surowiecki says the Democrats are using the financial crisis to push through programs that are in the long-term interest of Americans.
The Colbert ReportS5 Economic Stimulus Debate
Democrats take a page from the Republicans' fear book when selling the economic stimulus bill.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 2/9/09
A married lesbian couple files for divorce and moves into separate Subaru Outbacks, and someone won a Grammy.
The Colbert ReportS5 The New Word Czar
Michael Steele navigates the subtleties of our language as he talks about the stimulus bill.
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