The Colbert Report

ThreatDown - Pirates

Season 1 • 11/07/2005

Now the bears are coming after our women? Not on Stephen's watch, Smokey.

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Watching

05:56

Better Know a District - Ohio's 11th - Stephanie Tubbs Jones
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen Colbert and Stephanie Tubbs Jones discuss Lincoln's hobbies.
11/03/2005
03:22

The Word - Shhhh!...
The Colbert ReportS1

During Bush's first term, we didn't want to know all the depressing things that were going on, and the press had the savvy not to try and find out.
11/03/2005
02:29

Judge Tubbs
The Colbert ReportS1

The Colbert Report hires Ohio Representative Stephanie Tubbs Jones to be its new legal expert.
11/03/2005
00:30

Intro - 11/3/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Ladies of a certain age, The Colbert Report gives you -- Bradley Whitford
11/03/2005
01:17

Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots
The Colbert ReportS1

On the fifth anniversary of George W. Bush's presidential election, Stephen uses Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots to illustrate the anger of the citizens.
11/07/2005
03:04

Rioting Do's and Don'ts
The Colbert ReportS1

Smashing windows and burning cars are both riot essentials.
11/07/2005
00:30

Intro - 11/7/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Revolution in Paris, The Report in Canada, Eliot Spitzer in the studio and another Christmas tradition threatened: all coming up!
11/07/2005
06:22

Eliot Spitzer
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen speak with governor-hopeful Eliot Spitzer about campaign costs, his chances of winning and if he agrees that bears are a major threat.
11/07/2005
00:08

Fract - Frnap: The Freedom Snap
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen introduces the Freedom Snap: the Frnap -- which shouts an insult at your country.
11/07/2005
03:32

The Word - Hoser
The Colbert ReportS1

After Canada picked up The Colbert Report, Stephen began to rethink his ill feelings towards the country that was once put on notice.
11/07/2005
03:46

ThreatDown - Pirates
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen warns us about pirates, Canadian optometrists, professional musicians, mixing romance with NASCAR, and of course, bears.
11/07/2005
00:41

Yet Another Day - Flesh-Eating Virus
The Colbert ReportS1

Tomorrow morning on "Yet Another Day," Christina tells you how to avoid contracting a flesh-eating virus.
11/08/2005
01:28

Intercepted Satellite Feed
The Colbert ReportS1

Bloggers intercepted satellite feed of Stephen's interview with Bradley Whitford and posted the footage on the Internet.
11/08/2005
03:25

Tip/Wag - Convicted Murderers
The Colbert ReportS1

Prisons holding murderers should step up their level of security to, say, that of a local bar.
11/08/2005
02:21

The Word - T.O.
The Colbert ReportS1

The Philadelphia Eagles are suspending Terrell Owens for the rest of the season. But they've forgotten something: Terrell is a very good football player.
11/08/2005
00:08

Fract - Franagram: American Patriot
The Colbert ReportS1

"American Patriot" anagrams to "I am an erotic part."
11/08/2005
01:48

Wilford Brimley Calls - Cocoon
The Colbert ReportS1

Wilford Brimley doesn't understand why Stephen isn't using the cocoon he sent as a set decoration.
11/08/2005
01:13

America Doesn't Torture
The Colbert ReportS1

The president says that America doesn't do anything illegal. Torture is illegal. Ergo -- and that's Latin for "bite me" -- we do not torture.
11/08/2005
00:31

Intro - 11/8/05
The Colbert ReportS1

On the agenda: Terrell Owens, torture, Christmas tradition and Court TV's Catherine Crier.
11/08/2005
07:20

Catherine Crier
The Colbert ReportS1

To get into the news business, Catherine Crier said, "Boys, I've got a camera in the living room. You wanna come over and make a tape?"
11/08/2005
00:27

Intro - 11/9/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Arnold Schwarzenegger's propositions are turned down at the ballot box, and Stephen looks forward to talking with author Mary Roach.
11/09/2005
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