The Colbert Report

ThreatDown - Pirates

Season 1 • 11/07/2005

Now the bears are coming after our women? Not on Stephen's watch, Smokey.

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Watching

05:56

The Colbert ReportS1
Better Know a District - Ohio's 11th - Stephanie Tubbs Jones

Stephen Colbert and Stephanie Tubbs Jones discuss Lincoln's hobbies.
11/03/2005
03:22

The Colbert ReportS1
The Word - Shhhh!...

During Bush's first term, we didn't want to know all the depressing things that were going on, and the press had the savvy not to try and find out.
11/03/2005
02:29

The Colbert ReportS1
Judge Tubbs

The Colbert Report hires Ohio Representative Stephanie Tubbs Jones to be its new legal expert.
11/03/2005
00:30

The Colbert ReportS1
Intro - 11/3/05

Ladies of a certain age, The Colbert Report gives you -- Bradley Whitford
11/03/2005
01:17

The Colbert ReportS1
Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots

On the fifth anniversary of George W. Bush's presidential election, Stephen uses Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots to illustrate the anger of the citizens.
11/07/2005
03:04

The Colbert ReportS1
Rioting Do's and Don'ts

Smashing windows and burning cars are both riot essentials.
11/07/2005
00:30

The Colbert ReportS1
Intro - 11/7/05

Revolution in Paris, The Report in Canada, Eliot Spitzer in the studio and another Christmas tradition threatened: all coming up!
11/07/2005
06:22

The Colbert ReportS1
Eliot Spitzer

Stephen speak with governor-hopeful Eliot Spitzer about campaign costs, his chances of winning and if he agrees that bears are a major threat.
11/07/2005
00:08

The Colbert ReportS1
Fract - Frnap: The Freedom Snap

Stephen introduces the Freedom Snap: the Frnap -- which shouts an insult at your country.
11/07/2005
03:32

The Colbert ReportS1
The Word - Hoser

After Canada picked up The Colbert Report, Stephen began to rethink his ill feelings towards the country that was once put on notice.
11/07/2005
03:46

The Colbert ReportS1
ThreatDown - Pirates

Stephen warns us about pirates, Canadian optometrists, professional musicians, mixing romance with NASCAR, and of course, bears.
11/07/2005
00:41

The Colbert ReportS1
Yet Another Day - Flesh-Eating Virus

Tomorrow morning on "Yet Another Day," Christina tells you how to avoid contracting a flesh-eating virus.
11/08/2005
01:28

The Colbert ReportS1
Intercepted Satellite Feed

Bloggers intercepted satellite feed of Stephen's interview with Bradley Whitford and posted the footage on the Internet.
11/08/2005
03:25

The Colbert ReportS1
Tip/Wag - Convicted Murderers

Prisons holding murderers should step up their level of security to, say, that of a local bar.
11/08/2005
02:21

The Colbert ReportS1
The Word - T.O.

The Philadelphia Eagles are suspending Terrell Owens for the rest of the season. But they've forgotten something: Terrell is a very good football player.
11/08/2005
00:08

The Colbert ReportS1
Fract - Franagram: American Patriot

"American Patriot" anagrams to "I am an erotic part."
11/08/2005
01:48

The Colbert ReportS1
Wilford Brimley Calls - Cocoon

Wilford Brimley doesn't understand why Stephen isn't using the cocoon he sent as a set decoration.
11/08/2005
01:13

The Colbert ReportS1
America Doesn't Torture

The president says that America doesn't do anything illegal. Torture is illegal. Ergo -- and that's Latin for "bite me" -- we do not torture.
11/08/2005
00:31

The Colbert ReportS1
Intro - 11/8/05

On the agenda: Terrell Owens, torture, Christmas tradition and Court TV's Catherine Crier.
11/08/2005
07:20

The Colbert ReportS1
Catherine Crier

To get into the news business, Catherine Crier said, "Boys, I've got a camera in the living room. You wanna come over and make a tape?"
11/08/2005
00:27

The Colbert ReportS1
Intro - 11/9/05

Arnold Schwarzenegger's propositions are turned down at the ballot box, and Stephen looks forward to talking with author Mary Roach.
11/09/2005
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