The Colbert Report
Intro - 1/11/07
Season 3 • 01/11/2007
Stephen celebrates Gitmo's 5th anniversary.
The Colbert ReportS3 President's Speech
Watching President Bush address the nation is like hanging out with your best bud.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - Worry
Stephen wants to delicately remove Missouri and replace it with a stronger heartland: Texas.
The Colbert ReportS3 Invasion of the Country Snatchers
Winning baby contests is what illegal immigrants are leaving their families and risking their lives to come here for.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/10/07
The red states may be turning blue, Tek Jansen has a new adventure, and America's taste in food is getting fancier.
The Colbert ReportS3 Sign Off - Thawing Meat
Never thaw meat, poultry and fish products on the counter or in the sink without cold water.
The Colbert ReportS3 Tek Jansen - Hounds of Hell: Ragtime Billy Peaches
In this episode, Tek Jansen is mysteriously teleported to the combatosphere orbiting over Asteroid Z.
The Colbert ReportS3 What Number Is Stephen Thinking Of? - Doubled Up
Stephen reminds his viewers that just because the numbers on the board are between one and five hundred, that doesn't mean the number he's thinking of is.
The Colbert ReportS3 Tip/Wag - Science and Technology
Stephen is outraged by the iPhone unless he gets one for free.
The Colbert ReportS3 Judy Woodruff
Judy Woodruff talks about her new PBS documentary on Generation Next and grills Stephen on his tattoos.
The Colbert ReportS3 Ken Roth
On the fifth anniversary of Guantanamo Bay, Human Rights Watch executive director Ken Roth joins Stephen.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/11/07
Stephen sends a monogrammed waterboard to Guantanamo for its fifth anniversary.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - Victory!
Stephen suggests we redefine our goals to what is actually happening. Then victory will be ours.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/15/07
Stephen discusses plastic surgery with author Alex Kuczynski and debuts his new financial segment.
The Colbert ReportS3 Alex Kuczynski
Alex Kuczynski explains why we don't look better after spending $15 billion on plastic surgery.
The Colbert ReportS3 A Man's Touch
It's insensitive to remind Condoleezza Rice that she's going to die without knowing a man's touch.
The Colbert ReportS3 Bears & Balls - Gas
Buy gas! It's a sure-fire commodity with no risk except for the sure risk of fire.
The Colbert ReportS3 Inspired by Dr. King
Stephen calls for a national lie-in. It's time to go beyond passive resistance to pure passiveness.
The Colbert ReportS3 Squeaky Chair
Stephen is feeling a little high-strung with Bill O'Reilly's impending visit, and his chair is caught in the crossfire.
The Colbert ReportS3 Pesos for Pizza
Stephen is forced to rethink his three least favorite words: the Hollywood Foreign Press.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - Symbolic
A symbolic Congress makes a symbolic stand against a symbolic war.
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