The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Season 5 • 09/05/2000
George W. Bush gives us a glimpse of how wars might start if he was president.
Headlines - Nouveau RichThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Millions of Americans throw thousands of drunken parties to celebrate the death of friendship, trust and scruples.
Vincent D'OnofrioThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Vincent D'Onofrio tells Jon what he did with the throne he got from one of his movies.
Moment of Zen - Japanese SantaThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
A Japanese man dressed as Santa Claus wishes everyone a Merry Christmas.
Other News - Living KringleThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Copenhagen hosts an international Santa convention, the likes of which a world of now-heartbroken children have never seen.
Item of the Week - US MagazineThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Laura Bush tells US Magazine that her husband is smarter than he appears.
Moment of Zen - Bush is PoliteThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
President Bush has no problem calling New York Times journalists like he sees them.
Donal LogueThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Instead of listening, Jon's thinking of getting work as a game show host when he gets fired.
DebatesThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Bush wants his podium to be "Homebase", while Gore wants to debate "Mexican Style."
Warped Factor 9The Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Steve Carell addresses the great strides Klingons have made in assimilation.
This Just In - Casino EvilThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
The millionaire mogul noted that Native American gambling establishments are among the most cost-effective because they use every party of the casino.
CommentThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
George W. Bush regrets that his comment about a New York Times reporter made it to the public air waves.
Corrections/Retractions/Apologies - ConventionThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Jon confirms a couple of things: cookies and ass go together and Governor Bush was not sexually aroused by his presidential nomination.
Zodiac Buzz KillerThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Stacey Grenrock-Woods explains that due to thousands of years of space recklessly expanding, astrology may be gravely flawed.
Headlines - Kofi's ChoiceThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
World leaders hold a summit at the United Nations, Steve Carell gives a traffic update on the Manhattan area and "Big Brother" offers a bribe to any contestant on the show.
Greg KinnearThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Greg Kinnear talks about going to the set of "General Hospital" and taking up the dangerous hobby of flying.
Other News - Razor BurnThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Children are folded in half, stuffed in backpacks and carried to hospitals after scooter injuries skyrocket.
Moment of Zen - Pat Morita SingsThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Pat Morita sings the national anthem at the Democratic National Convention.
Indecision 2000 - Round-UpThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
If the average wrestling fan were old enough to vote, it would be a write-in for more boobs.
A Slick CampaignThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
No one would have thought that a town's fortunes could be turned around by a lop-sided, yellowish, garlic looking, blob with a huge green ass.
Moment of Zen - Putin the Hurt OnThe Daily Show with Jon StewartS5
Vladimir Putin, dressed in a gi, throws a man to the ground.
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