The Colbert Report
Season 5 • 09/29/2009
The Spider-Pope can shoot holy water from his wrists and trap atheists in his web.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 9/24/09
The Republican Party is accused of racism, another holiday is under attack, and Ken Burns makes a documentary about national parks.
The Colbert ReportS5 Sign Off - Goodnight, Conan
Stephen says goodnight to Conan O'Brien as he comforts himself with Americone Dream.
The Colbert ReportS5 Sheryl WuDunn
Sheryl WuDunn believes giving women loans and educating girls is the way to lift developing nations out of poverty.
The Colbert ReportS5 Atone Phone - Last Day of Apologies
Paul Krugman apologizes for winning the Nobel Prize in Economics, and J.J. Abrams is sorry for making his hidden puzzle too difficult to solve.
The Colbert ReportS5 Do, Dump or Marry
Glamour readers vote to dump Conan O'Brien, do Jimmy Fallon and marry Stephen.
The Colbert ReportS5 The Word - Out of the Closet
Republicans and Democrats should march in pride parades and proudly announce their relationship with lobbyists.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 9/29/09
An exciting new tobacco product hits the market, and Matt Latimer recalls his Bush speechwriting days.
The Colbert ReportS5 Sign Off - Richard Dawkins Will Be Here Tomorrow
Noted atheist writer Richard Dawkins will be on tomorrow night.
The Colbert ReportS5 Cheating Death - Snus & Placebo Effect
Camel develops a new way to deliver smooth carcinogens without lighting up, and placebos become more effective.
The Colbert ReportS5 Matt Latimer
Matt Latimer, a former speechwriter for the Bush administration, remembers the words he used most when writing for the president.
The Colbert ReportS5 Spider-Pope
If the spider crawling on Pope Benedict XVI's face has bitten him, we might soon have a Spider-Pope.
The Colbert ReportS5 Sign Off - Goodnight, Grammy
Stephen says goodnight to his grammy.
The Colbert ReportS5 Send Your Medical Bills to Max Baucus
Senator Max Baucus will pay for your medical bills from the $3.2 million he's received from the health care industry.
The Colbert ReportS5 A Pace Odyssey
NASA begins assembling Stephen's treadmill so America's famously fat astronauts can get trim in space.
The Colbert ReportS5 Richard Dawkins
After offering evidence for evolution, Richard Dawkins wants to see the evidence for God.
The Colbert ReportS5 ThreatDown - Environmentalists, Kang Lee & Mountain Pine Beetles
Environmentalists target soft toilet paper, Kang Lee exposes the lies parents tell kids, and mountain pine beetles prevent us from shooting bears.
The Colbert ReportS5 Intro - 9/30/09
Stephen has an update on his space treadmill, and he'll evolve Richard Dawkins' book into tiny shreds of paper.
The Colbert ReportS5 Francis Collins
Francis Collins informs Stephen that it's going to take time for stem cell research to give him crab claws.
The Colbert ReportS5 Eating the Distance - The Brad Sciullo Story Pt. 1
Competitive eater Brad Sciullo wants to prove anything is possible by finishing a 15-pound hamburger called "The Belly Buster."
The Colbert ReportS5 Najibullah Zazi Threatens Beauty Supplies
Suspected terrorist Najibullah Zazi threatens America's unregulated use of beauty supplies.
You may also like4 Videos
South ParkGet Ready for a Masterpiece Season of South Park
Music to our ears: South Park finally returns for Season 25 on Wednesday, February 2.
Hot Mess HolidayDiwali Gets Wild in Hot Mess Holiday
Melanie Chandra and Surina Jindal embark on a zany weekend adventure during Diwali in the Comedy Central original movie Hot Mess Holiday, now streaming.
A Clüsterfünke ChristmasA Clüsterfünke Christmas Is TV's Holiday-est Movie
Featuring a hunky lumberjack, a quaint family business and more, everybody's favorite holiday tropes come together in Comedy Central's festive TV-movie parody, A Clüsterfünke Christmas.