The Colbert Report
Intro - 4/24/07
Season 3 • 04/24/2007
Congress may install two new seats. Who will get the no-bid contract to install them?
Mike Huckabee - Running Mate BidThe Colbert ReportS3
Mike Huckabee and Stephen talk about plastic fruit and rowing in paddleboats in Central Park.
Colbert Nation Online Discussion GroupThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen speaks to those interested in joining a Colbert Nation discussion group.
Russell SimmonsThe Colbert ReportS3
Russell Simmons talks about Oprah, diamonds and the secret to success.
D.C. Voting Rights - Eleanor Holmes NortonThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen tells Eleanor Holmes Norton that this is the United States of America, not the United Districts of Columbia of America.
The Word - Act GloballyThe Colbert ReportS3
According to the head of the EPA, George W. Bush is making major progress -- there is a 4/10ths of one percent reduction in the increase of greenhouse gasses.
60% Good NewsThe Colbert ReportS3
When Stephen watches "Fox & Friends," he feels like he's watching a Disney movie about the news.
Dr. Andrew WeilThe Colbert ReportS3
Dr. Andrew Weil tells Stephen that it's possible to channel his rage in a useful way and that he finds Dr. House to be too cynical.
Bye-Bye to BorisThe Colbert ReportS3
Russia's first democratically elected President, Boris Yeltsin, has passed away and the New York Post has paid tribute with their usual class and sensitivity.
Sign Off - Captain LeadThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen reminisces about his favorite childhood toys: Captain Lead, General Light Socket, Admiral Dry Cleaning Bag, Lieutenant Fluffy -- and his wad of asbestos.
Alpha Dog of the Week - Uncle BenThe Colbert ReportS3
After 61 years, Uncle Ben is now not only spokesman of his products but CEO of the company.
Intro - 4/24/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen discusses President Bush's fight against global warming and the two seats being considered for Congress, and sits down with new age medical guru Dr. Andrew Weil.
New Issue of GQThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen expects the new issue of GQ with him on the cover to be the most popular issue they've ever had.
Four Horsemen of the A-Pop-Calypse - PrayerThe Colbert ReportS3
People don't develop special powers, they pray for them. The only reason Superman can fly is because Jesus is carrying him.
The Word - SacrificeThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen supports enlisting illegal immigrants in the war in Iraq, simultaneously bolstering our fighting forces and solving our immigration dilemma.
Sign Off - PromisesThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen doesn't want to make any promises he can't keep, but he'll see you tomorrow night.
Dead to Me - Long WarThe Colbert ReportS3
Good news -- the long war in Iraq is over! That is, the use of the phrase 'Long War' is over thanks to Admiral William J. Fallon.
Intro - 4/25/07The Colbert ReportS3
America faces a troop shortage, Stephen unleashes on pop culture, and the U.S. Comptroller General David Walker talks with Stephen about the national debt.
David WalkerThe Colbert ReportS3
Accountant David Walker warns of a 50 trillion dollar deficit and Stephen asks if his haircut can be a tax write off.
Tom WolfeThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen disagrees with new journalism because he believes people want entertaining journalism, not factual journalism.
Intro - 4/26/07The Colbert ReportS3
The U.S. Army's constructing walls in Iraq, Stephen gets to know Guam better, and author Tom Wolfe talks about journalism.
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