The Colbert Report

Sign Off - Mrs. Colbert

Season 2 E 128 • 10/10/2006

In Stephen's book, you're all Miss Americas. No, better -- you're all Mrs. Colberts.

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02:09

Behavioral Profiling
The Colbert ReportS2 E126

Security personnel have begun using behavioral profiling to identify suspicious individuals at airports. They won't say exactly what they're looking for, but Stephen will.
10/05/2006
05:08

Stephen Greets Kim Jong-il
The Colbert ReportS2 E127

Stephen greets Kim Jong-il in Korean, which he's been learning since around 1:36 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time.
10/09/2006
00:28

Intro - 10/9/06
The Colbert ReportS2 E127

Making schools safer, North Korea's nuclear bomb test, an interview with Randy Newman, and why Stephen is like Wonder Woman.
10/09/2006
05:22

Randy Newman
The Colbert ReportS2 E127

Randy Newman wonders whether he's at the McCarthy hearings -- and rolls over on George Clooney.
10/09/2006
03:32

Sport Report - Saginaw Spirit 3-0 with Steagle Colbeagle
The Colbert ReportS2 E127

Over the weekend, the Yankees were knocked out of the playoffs and T.O. returned to Philly, so let's start with Junior League Hockey.
10/09/2006
03:33

The Word - Safety
The Colbert ReportS2 E127

Stephen agrees with Wisconsin State Assemblyman Frank Lasse that the only way to keep guns out of the classroom is to put guns in the classroom.
10/09/2006
05:49

Ariel Levy
The Colbert ReportS2 E128

Ariel Levy thinks women who imitate porn stars are far from any sort of authentic sexual liberation. Stephen thinks she sounds like a Muslim fundamentalist.
10/10/2006
05:54

Jane Fonda and Gloria Steinem
The Colbert ReportS2 E128

The sparks fly when Stephen heads to the kitchen with Gloria Steinem and Jane Fonda in a "Kiss the Cook" apron, and the phrase "Ice cream three-way" is coined.
10/10/2006
02:17

A Salute to the American Lady
The Colbert ReportS2 E128

Stephen has been advised by counsel not to go into any of the details of the disturbing allegations against him -- which is a shame, because they're pretty arousing.
10/10/2006
04:46

Stephen R.A.P.S. - Gender Issues
The Colbert ReportS2 E128

Stephen heads out into the audience to take on a few tough questions about gender, which he doesn't see.
10/10/2006
01:44

Sign Off - Mrs. Colbert
The Colbert ReportS2 E128

In Stephen's book, every person in the country is Miss America. No, better -- Mrs. Colbert.
10/10/2006
04:14

Tek Jansen - Space Station Theta-Zeus-Aquarius
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Tek Jansen is dispatched by Senator Depaaa to Space Station Theta-Zeus-Aquarius to rendezvous with the Hgbwian envoy, and now must park his space cruiser.
10/11/2006
05:18

Green Screen - George Lucas
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Witness the groundbreaking meeting between Stephen and Jar Jar Binks!
10/11/2006
02:53

Green Screen Challenge - The Winner
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Green Screen Challenge entries are graded according to 58 criteria including originality and poise. Can Bonnie R. post a perfect score to beat George L.'s near-perfect 39.9?
10/11/2006
00:36

Intro - 10/11/06
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Google buys YouTube, a new Tek Jansen adventure is aired, and Stephen announces the winner of the Green Screen Challenge.
10/11/2006
01:01

Stephen Cashes In
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Stephen estimates that the 2,600 videos of him on YouTube are about a third of the total -- so he's owed a third of the $1.65 billion from the site's sale to Google.
10/11/2006
02:37

Green Screen Challenge - The Final Cut
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Stephen's set to announce the winner of the Green Screen Challenge -- but not without paying tribute, in montage form, to the many heroes who submitted entries.
10/11/2006
05:18

Green Screen Challenge - The Finalists
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Stephen shows the entries from the two finalists, Bonnie R. of Torrance, CA, and George L. of Marin County, CA.
10/11/2006
02:39

Shout Out! - From Baghdad to The Report
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Stephen sends a shout out to three army soldiers who've replaced the sign pointing to Baghdad with a sign pointing to The Colbert Report's studio.
10/11/2006
00:32

Lightsaber Duel
The Colbert ReportS2 E129

Stephen has a lightsaber duel with George Lucas.
10/11/2006
00:31

Intro - 10/12/06
The Colbert ReportS2 E130

Tonight: North Korean threats, New Jersey's 4th district and Governor Brian Schweitzer.
10/12/2006
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