The Colbert Report
Sign Off - Mrs. Colbert
Season 2 E 128 • 10/10/2006
In Stephen's book, you're all Miss Americas. No, better -- you're all Mrs. Colberts.
Behavioral ProfilingThe Colbert ReportS2 E126
Security personnel have begun using behavioral profiling to identify suspicious individuals at airports. They won't say exactly what they're looking for, but Stephen will.
Stephen Greets Kim Jong-ilThe Colbert ReportS2 E127
Stephen greets Kim Jong-il in Korean, which he's been learning since around 1:36 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time.
Intro - 10/9/06The Colbert ReportS2 E127
Making schools safer, North Korea's nuclear bomb test, an interview with Randy Newman, and why Stephen is like Wonder Woman.
Randy NewmanThe Colbert ReportS2 E127
Randy Newman wonders whether he's at the McCarthy hearings -- and rolls over on George Clooney.
Sport Report - Saginaw Spirit 3-0 with Steagle ColbeagleThe Colbert ReportS2 E127
Over the weekend, the Yankees were knocked out of the playoffs and T.O. returned to Philly, so let's start with Junior League Hockey.
The Word - SafetyThe Colbert ReportS2 E127
Stephen agrees with Wisconsin State Assemblyman Frank Lasse that the only way to keep guns out of the classroom is to put guns in the classroom.
Ariel LevyThe Colbert ReportS2 E128
Ariel Levy thinks women who imitate porn stars are far from any sort of authentic sexual liberation. Stephen thinks she sounds like a Muslim fundamentalist.
Jane Fonda and Gloria SteinemThe Colbert ReportS2 E128
The sparks fly when Stephen heads to the kitchen with Gloria Steinem and Jane Fonda in a "Kiss the Cook" apron, and the phrase "Ice cream three-way" is coined.
A Salute to the American LadyThe Colbert ReportS2 E128
Stephen has been advised by counsel not to go into any of the details of the disturbing allegations against him -- which is a shame, because they're pretty arousing.
Stephen R.A.P.S. - Gender IssuesThe Colbert ReportS2 E128
Stephen heads out into the audience to take on a few tough questions about gender, which he doesn't see.
Sign Off - Mrs. ColbertThe Colbert ReportS2 E128
In Stephen's book, every person in the country is Miss America. No, better -- Mrs. Colbert.
Tek Jansen - Space Station Theta-Zeus-AquariusThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Tek Jansen is dispatched by Senator Depaaa to Space Station Theta-Zeus-Aquarius to rendezvous with the Hgbwian envoy, and now must park his space cruiser.
Green Screen - George LucasThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Witness the groundbreaking meeting between Stephen and Jar Jar Binks!
Green Screen Challenge - The WinnerThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Green Screen Challenge entries are graded according to 58 criteria including originality and poise. Can Bonnie R. post a perfect score to beat George L.'s near-perfect 39.9?
Intro - 10/11/06The Colbert ReportS2 E129
Google buys YouTube, a new Tek Jansen adventure is aired, and Stephen announces the winner of the Green Screen Challenge.
Stephen Cashes InThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Stephen estimates that the 2,600 videos of him on YouTube are about a third of the total -- so he's owed a third of the $1.65 billion from the site's sale to Google.
Green Screen Challenge - The Final CutThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Stephen's set to announce the winner of the Green Screen Challenge -- but not without paying tribute, in montage form, to the many heroes who submitted entries.
Green Screen Challenge - The FinalistsThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Stephen shows the entries from the two finalists, Bonnie R. of Torrance, CA, and George L. of Marin County, CA.
Shout Out! - From Baghdad to The ReportThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Stephen sends a shout out to three army soldiers who've replaced the sign pointing to Baghdad with a sign pointing to The Colbert Report's studio.
Lightsaber DuelThe Colbert ReportS2 E129
Stephen has a lightsaber duel with George Lucas.
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