John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show
Pete Holmes - New York State Lottery
Season 2 E 1 • 03/24/2011
The New York State Lottery slogan? "Hey, you never know." That's what they went with; they had a meeting.
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01:53
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
John Oliver and Pete Holmes - Nasal Spray
Pete Holmes invents the dorkiest way to snort cocaine in history.
03/24/2011
02:43
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
John Oliver - The Power of Swearing
Don't tell John Oliver that swearing is wrong. He has seen its healing properties.
03/24/2011
03:42
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Pete Holmes - Making Fun of Movies
Pete Holmes doesn't think he should have to make a movie just so he can make fun of movies.
03/24/2011
01:35
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Pete Holmes - Wall Drug
Pete Holmes doesn't exactly expect laughter when talking about the oldest drug store in America -- silence and sleepiness is more like it.
03/24/2011
02:30
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Pete Holmes - Google in Your Pocket
Pete Holmes thinks having Google on your phone is a lot like having a drunk know-it-all in your pocket.
03/24/2011
03:18
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Glenn Wool - New York
If the next song written about New York doesn't include a verse on bed bugs, it's false advertising.
03/24/2011
03:02
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Pete Holmes - The Museum
Pete Holmes doesn't care about museums, he only cares that people think he's the kind of guy that goes to museums.
03/24/2011
02:16
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Rory Scovel - Jesus
People call us the lazy generation but we're really just asking what Jesus would do.
03/24/2011
03:57
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Rory Scovel - Abortion
Rory explains that they can't all be abortion jokes; we're going to hear about Batman, too.
03/24/2011
02:56
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
John Oliver - People Who Don't Swear
John doesn't understand people who don't swear. What exactly are you waiting for?
03/24/2011
02:31
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Pete Holmes - New York State Lottery
The New York State Lottery slogan? "Hey, you never know." That's what they went with; they had a meeting.
03/24/2011
02:31
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
John Oliver - German Airport
John is very careful to not get on just any old bus in Germany. He's seen enough Oscar-winning movies to know that.
03/24/2011
01:20
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Pete Holmes - The Boot
Pete Holmes pre-empts any Internet speculation by explaining why he's wearing a corrective boot.
03/24/2011
01:24
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
John Oliver - Real Problem
The fact that politicians don't swear is something John Oliver finds inherently untrustworthy.
03/24/2011
01:32
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Kyle Kinane - Amount of Money
Kyle Kinane does not need a new electric guitar -- he needs to go to the dentist.
03/24/2011
03:10
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E1
Kyle Kinane - Canada
Winnipeg's tourism selling point is that they are the geographic center of North America. That's it.
03/24/2011
02:09
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E2
Moshe Kasher - The Gross Part of the Country
Moshe Kasher thinks the middle part of America is only good for banjos, moonshine and twirly mustaches.
03/31/2011
04:39
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E2
John Oliver - A Footballer's Penis
John Oliver lost his faith in athletes when he was eight years old in a public restroom in England. Don't worry, it's not that kind of story.
03/31/2011
02:27
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E2
Marina Franklin - Cougar
Marina Franklin's boyfriend is young and white and he wants her to meet his mama.
03/31/2011
02:26
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E2
Maria Bamford - Botox
Maria Bamford's manager suggested she get Botox, but she's kinda still using her face.
03/31/2011
02:33
John Oliver's New York Stand-Up ShowS2 E2
Maria Bamford - Gotta Believe in Something
According to Maria Bamford's mom, whatever you think about all the time is what you worship.
03/31/2011
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