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The Colbert Report
Intro - 1/5/09
Season 5 • 01/05/2009
Don't drink grain alcohol before eggnog.
More
Watching
03:22
The Colbert Report
S4
Rod Blagojevich's Birthday
Governor, you really shouldn't have told anyone about last year's birthday wish to get away with your crimes.
12/10/2008
03:49
The Colbert Report
S4
The Ghost of Stage Manager Bobby
The ghost of Bobby returns to show Stephen what his life was like before he became a greedy, narcissistic shell of a man.
12/11/2008
00:37
The Colbert Report
S4
Intro - 12/11/08
Atheists are trying to take the Christ out of Christmas. What's next, taking the Christ out of Christiane Amanpour?
12/11/2008
00:38
The Colbert Report
S4
Stephen Eats Ghost Ribs
Stephen wishes everybody a Merry Christmas, especially his former stage manager Bobby.
12/11/2008
07:09
The Colbert Report
S4
Michael Phelps
Michael Phelps will compete in the 2010 Winter Olympics after Stephen teaches him how to ice dance.
12/11/2008
07:22
The Colbert Report
S4
The Word - The Unbearable Lightness of Supreme Being
Christmas really burns atheists up, which they can think of as a preview of their afterlife.
12/11/2008
06:29
The Colbert Report
S5
Colbert and Colmes - Roland Burris Appointment
Rod Blagojevich proves himself to be a civil rights leader.
01/05/2009
04:37
The Colbert Report
S5
John King
Stephen congratulates John King and the rest of the media on getting Obama elected.
01/05/2009
05:12
The Colbert Report
S5
Tek Jansen - Beginning's First Dawn: Episode Three
Tek Jansen attempts to free some innocent, delicious beings from slavery.
01/05/2009
02:52
The Colbert Report
S5
Colbert and Colmes - Colmes Gets Fired
Alan Colmes can't come back to the show unless he has a book to promote.
01/05/2009
00:27
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 1/5/09
Stephen is still feeling the effects of his New Year's celebration.
01/05/2009
00:25
The Colbert Report
S5
Thank You, Stephen
Stephen wants to thank all the people who make this show possible.
01/06/2009
03:28
The Colbert Report
S5
Ponzi Schemes
Bernard Madoff lost less money than AIG and he throws way better parties.
01/06/2009
03:59
The Colbert Report
S5
Hiding Gold - David Leonhardt
David Leonhardt endorses Stephen's new business of hiding gold.
01/06/2009
05:09
The Colbert Report
S5
Matt Miller
Matt Miller says the government must make sure we have basic securities like health care and pensions.
01/06/2009
06:59
The Colbert Report
S5
Better Know a District - Utah's 3rd - Jason Chaffetz
Stephen beats Jason Chaffetz in leg wrestling.
01/06/2009
00:36
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 1/7/09
Obama wants to make it easier for people to sue their employers for past abuse. Jon Stewart, Stephen's silence about your workouts ends.
01/07/2009
06:10
The Colbert Report
S5
Benicio Del Toro
Benicio Del Toro talks about meeting Castro to prepare for "Che."
01/07/2009
05:32
The Colbert Report
S5
The Word - Statute of Liberty
If Barack Obama wants people to get the justice they were denied in the past, he should get someone to deny their civil rights now.
01/07/2009
02:49
The Colbert Report
S5
Dr. Gupta's Penis Pyramid
If Sanjay Gupta gets appointed as surgeon general he'll change the food pyramid.
01/07/2009
03:24
The Colbert Report
S5
Tip/Wag - Cocaine Honey
Now we know that the missing honeybees are in the bathroom doing a bump.
01/07/2009
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