The Colbert Report

Tip/Wag - Bilk

Season 3 • 02/27/2007

Bilk (a combo of milk and beer) is the first drink that repairs bones while destroying the liver.

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Zev Chafets
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Stephen and author Zev Chafets get to the bottom of which of the two of them is the most Jewish.
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Sign Off - The Stupidest Person in the World
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It's Monday night, and that means one thing -- it's time for The Stupidest Person in the World.
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Stephen's Sound Advice - Avoiding Humiliation on the Campaign Trail
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With more people running for president than ever before, it's never been easier to lose.
02/26/2007
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Intro - 2/26/07
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The British announce plans to cut and run, Tom Vilsack drops out of the presidential race, and Zev Chafets angles for a Christmas present.
02/26/2007
03:07

The Word - Success
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The Bush administration views Tony Blair's removal of British troops from Iraq as a sign of the war's success.
02/26/2007
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Craig Venter
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Stephen asks Dr. Craig Venter to sequence Stephen's genetic code in exchange for the free advertising Venter's getting by being on the show.
02/27/2007
00:32

Intro - 2/27/07
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Stephen questions whether assault rifles be used for hunting, Steagle Colbeagle the eagle receives an honor, and guest Dr. Craig Venter discusses genetic engineering.
02/27/2007
02:46

Dead to Me - Raptors
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Steagle Colbeagle is twice the mascot the Toronto Raptor will ever be.
02/27/2007
05:15

Gore's Garbage
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When Hannity and Colmes couldn't get Al Gore on their show to answer charges of excessive energy consumption, they attacked the next logical person: Daryl Hannah.
02/27/2007
04:47

The Word - Recoil
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Jim Zumbo is making distinctions among guns based on their appearance -- that's called discrimination.
02/27/2007
01:41

Tip/Wag - Bilk
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Bilk (a combo of milk and beer) is the most blatant example of marketing alcohol to children since St. Pauli baby.
02/27/2007
07:06

Nina Jablonski
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Stephen walks anthropologist Nina Jablonski through his skin care regimen.
02/28/2007
00:29

Intro - 2/28/07
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Anthropologist Nina Jablonski stops by to talk about skin, and attend Stephen's $10,000 a plate dinner to find out if it's getting too expensive to run for President.
02/28/2007
01:22

Obama vs. Colbert
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"The Audacity of Hope" isn't quite as powerful as the Audacity of Stephen.
02/28/2007
02:09

David Geffen the Intern?
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David Geffen, how would you like to be an intern on The Colbert Report?
02/28/2007
04:54

Problems Without Solutions: Stay-At-Home Dads
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Don't pity these stay-at-home dads -- they volunteered to have their balls stolen from them.
02/28/2007
04:30

Profiles in Quitters - Tom Vilsack
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Stephen tries to get Tom Vilsack to sell his soul to an evil corporate overlord to get money to run for president.
02/28/2007
05:24

Better Know a District - Tennessee's 9th - Steve Cohen
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Stephen proposes to Congressman Steve Cohen that Tennessee public restrooms be co-ed and promises not to look.
03/01/2007
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Intro - 3/1/07
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Tonight, tens of thousands pray for Stephen, exclusive coverage of the Anna Nicole Smith coverage and an interview with Larry King.
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Larry King
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Larry King calls Stephen Colbert an egomaniac like it's a bad thing.
03/01/2007
03:22

Jesus #1!
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Every decision Stephen made last Thursday was infused with a strong moral dimension.
03/01/2007
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