The Colbert Report

Intro - 1/7/13

Season 9 • 01/07/2013

America avoids a fiscal crisis, Bill O'Reilly faces the PC police, and Jimmy Wales talks Wikipedia.

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04:38

The Colbert ReportS9
Simone Campbell

Sister Simone Campbell discusses her "Nuns on the Bus" tour and explains how Paul Ryan's budget battle fails Jesus and the Constitution.
12/13/2012
05:56

The Colbert ReportS9
Uncensored - "Breaking Abbey"

First Lady Michelle Antoinette previews the next season of "Downton Abbey" while the world's commoners are left to fear what will become of the aristocrats.
12/13/2012
03:41

The Colbert ReportS9
Colbert Super PAC - The Ham Rove Memorial Fund

Stephen prays that Colbert Super PAC money is in a better place, and Ham's charitable fund scores a hefty donation from PO Box "Bite Me."
12/13/2012
02:29

The Colbert ReportS9
Hurricane Sandy Mega Concert

Paul McCartney, Bruce Springsteen and Eric Clapton were all just opening acts for rock legend Stephen Colbert at the 12/12/12 Hurricane Sandy benefit.
12/13/2012
03:33

The Colbert ReportS9
The Platinum Debt Ceiling Solution

Minting trillion dollar platinum coins to pay off America's debt is legal in that it is not technically illegal.
01/07/2013
05:30

The Colbert ReportS9
Blood in the Water - Bill O'Reilly's Racial Insensitivity

Wikipedia's elephants page has more protection than elephants, and the liberal media twists Bill O'Reilly's compliment about Asians.
01/07/2013
04:59

The Colbert ReportS9
Jimmy Wales

Wikipedia co-founder Jimmy Wales explains operating costs, censorship in China and the budding Wikivoyager.
01/07/2013
00:07

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - Goodnight

Stephen says goodnight.
01/07/2013
02:44

The Colbert ReportS9
Fiscal Cliff Deal & Disincentives

Republicans accept President Obama's tax hikes on the wealthy, but luckily this horrible deal contains a few loopholes.
01/07/2013
02:53

The Colbert ReportS9
Stephen's Holiday Break

Stephen spends the first six days of vacation just going to the bathroom.
01/07/2013
00:33

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 1/7/13

America dodges a financial crisis, the PC police attack Bill O'Reilly, and Wikipedia co-founder Jimmy Wales chats about his free encyclopedia.
01/07/2013
07:05

The Colbert ReportS9
Cheating Death - Rage & Blood Transfusions

People naturally blessed with soul-choking bitterness live longer than the terminally calm, and drinking young blood is a great alternative to exercising.
01/08/2013
04:08

The Colbert ReportS9
Bin Laden Film Controversy

Since America is long overdue for a thorough investigation into its use of torture in movies, the Senate Intelligence Committee goes after "Zero Dark Thirty."
01/08/2013
05:58

The Colbert ReportS9
Chris Kluwe

Chris Kluwe explains the punter's role and reiterates his support for pro-gay Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo.
01/08/2013
02:27

The Colbert ReportS9
Postage Price Hike

The USPS Forever Stamp goes up by one penny, which proves the government can't do anything right.
01/08/2013
00:13

The Colbert ReportS9
Sign Off - VACSA-TERN

Stephen sips on the blood of the young and admires himself in the mirror.
01/08/2013
00:38

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 1/8/13

Science finds the key to a long, healthy life, "Zero Dark Thirty" stirs up controversy, and NFL punter Chris Kluwe discusses gay rights advocacy.
01/08/2013
05:19

The Colbert ReportS9
Neil Shubin

The biological scientist shares his book, "The Universe Within: Discovering the Common History of Rocks, Planets, and People."
01/09/2013
04:51

The Colbert ReportS9
Gun Control Backlash

Schools work armed officers into their prom themes, and former NRA President Marion Hammer knows that outlawing assault weapons is just another form of discrimination.
01/09/2013
00:32

The Colbert ReportS9
Intro - 1/9/13

America considers gun control, a troubling food addiction surfaces, and paleontologist Neil Shubin finds the missing link between sea and land creatures.
01/09/2013
03:38

The Colbert ReportS9
Idaho's Walled & Armed Community

An exciting real estate opportunity boasts family shooting ranges, a firearms factory and safety from federal thugs.
01/09/2013
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