The Colbert Report
Monkey on the Lam - Missouri
Season 3 • 10/03/2007
Lock your doors and hide your bananas, there's a monkey on the lam.
John MearsheimerThe Colbert ReportS3
John Mearsheimer believes that concern for Israel controls U.S. foreign policy; Stephen thought it was Dick Cheney.
The Word - Troops Out NowThe Colbert ReportS3
In an alternate universe, Stephen smokes a peace pipe and tells us The Word.
The Real ShowdownThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen puts his career on the line and issues a challenge to author Paul Krugman.
Nailed 'Em - CyberroristsThe Colbert ReportS3
Rest easy, America. The Kent County Police nailed another cyber terrorist.
Intro - 10/2/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen questions whether tonight's show is happening in a giant's finger, cracks down on cybercrime and finds reality offensive.
Gay Roundup - Dan SavageThe Colbert ReportS3
Dan Savage gives his expert opinion on hate crime legislation.
Alpha Dog of the Week - President BushThe Colbert ReportS3
President Bush leaps from the back of the pack to the lead husky, leaving the rest of the world staring at his swinging sack.
Krugman CorrectionThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen finds out that Paul Krugman has in fact changed the release date of his book.
Intro - 10/3/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen counts down the days till his book comes out, and discusses gay issues while thinking about straight issues.
Jim LovellThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen asks Jim Lovell if there's anything cooler than going to the moon.
Monkey on the Lam - MissouriThe Colbert ReportS3
A monkey escaped from the University of Missouri in 1943 and remains at large to this day.
ThreatDown - Science and Technology EditionThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen decries remote controls, hybrid cars, careless scientists, white chocolate and robotic vacuums.
The Word - CatastropheThe Colbert ReportS3
North Korea's agreement to peacefully disarm its nuclear program is a catastrophe, since the United States doesn't negotiate with terrorists. (Just joking, Saudi Arabia.)
An "I Am America (And So Can You!)" Success StoryThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen hears a testimonial from a reader of his book, "I Am America (And So Can You!)."
John KaoThe Colbert ReportS3
John Kao says countries like Finland are starting to innovate better than the United States. Stephen wants to know if it's time to invade Finland.
Fred Thompson's Lackluster CandidacyThe Colbert ReportS3
At a recent campaign stop, Fred Thompson asked attendees for a round of applause after failing to get one. Stephen offers some advice on how to get applause without asking.
Intro - 10/4/07The Colbert ReportS3
Tonight: Why Bush is Truman, the dangers of hybrid cars, and guest John Kao's claim that America has lost its lead in innovation -- clearly he hasn't tried Oreo pizza.
Intro - 10/8/07The Colbert ReportS3
Rush Limbaugh is criticized for his comments about soldiers, President Bush vetoes health care legislation, and Stephen won't rest until all the state capitals are recognized.
The Word - Medium MattersThe Colbert ReportS3
The Constitution gives the media the right to say anything, but not everyone has the right to listen.
Doggie Co-AuthorThe Colbert ReportS3
The Pope is not the only one who wrote a book with a pet -- Stephen worked with a puppy named Riley.
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