The Colbert Report
Season 9 • 11/29/2012
During the Cold War, America planned to scare the Ruskies by nuking the moon.
Intro - 11/28/12The Colbert ReportS9
The war on men is like the war on women, Senate members debate the filibuster, and Frank Oz plugs "Little Shop of Horrors: The Director's Cut."
The Word - Sisters Are Doing It to ThemselvesThe Colbert ReportS9
According to Fox News's Suzanne Venker, modern women scare quality men away from marriage and undermine their ability to support a family.
Frank OzThe Colbert ReportS9
Frank Oz discusses his famous performances as Yoda, Fozzie Bear, and more, and explains why he prefers "Little Shop of Horrors: The Director's Cut" over the original.
Record Powerball JackpotThe Colbert ReportS9
After he wins the record lotto prize, Stephen will no longer have to slave away for the man 30 minutes a day, four days a week.
Sign Off - Stephen's MuppetThe Colbert ReportS9
Stephen's doppelganger says goodnight.
Sign Off - Acceptance SpeechThe Colbert ReportS9
Stephen thanks his agent, lawn guy and family.
Sean CarrollThe Colbert ReportS9
Cosmologist Sean Carroll discusses his book, "The Particle at the End of the Universe: How the Hunt for the Higgs Boson Leads Us to the Edge of a New World."
Intro - 11/29/12The Colbert ReportS9
Guns go to college, a major magazine slights Stephen, and theoretical physicist Sean Carroll shares his latest book.
Top 10 of 2012 & Operation Killing "Killing Kennedy"The Colbert ReportS9
While the media compiles countdown lists, Stephen competes for Time magazine's attention and goes after Bill O'Reilly's book, "Killing Kennedy."
Tip/Wag - Gay Rights Pioneers & Gun DormsThe Colbert ReportS9
Boeing's blatant devaluing of gay staff is great for the company's bottom line, and college is the time to do shots and get shot.
Moon-Shattering NewsThe Colbert ReportS9
America fell from greatness when milquetoast Dwight D. Eisenhower wimped out on the country's nuclear lunar program.
Ian McKellenThe Colbert ReportS9
An annoying Tolkien super fan knows more about Sir Ian McKellen's character in "The Hobbit" than he does.
The Word - Base InstinctsThe Colbert ReportS9
In the good old bad days of the 80s, Republicans could turn out the suburban white vote simply by showing images of fearsome felons.
Sign Off - The Pundit: Or Colbert and Back Again - StingThe Colbert ReportS9
Stephen raises the lost Gondolin blade.
Senior Moment - Granny PodsThe Colbert ReportS9
Why should seniors spend time in a cold hospital environment far from their families when they could be in a cold hospital environment within sight of their families?
Martin FreemanThe Colbert ReportS9
Actor Martin Freeman congratulates Stephen on his Tolkien quiz victory and shares his best Bilbo Baggins moment.
Sign Off - The Pundit: Or Colbert and Back Again - RivendellThe Colbert ReportS9
Stephen smokes his wizardly pipe in Rivendell.
The Pundit: Or Colbert and Back Again - Hobbit Week Night TwoThe Colbert ReportS9
Wizardly weed is good for special smoke rings, and guest Martin Freeman plays Bilbo Baggins in "The Hobbit."
Low-T & Low-OThe Colbert ReportS9
An easily spread endocrine toxin boosts men's testosterone levels, while 11% to 41% of women suffer from female orgasmic disorder.
Kate the Great's Morning SicknessThe Colbert ReportS9
Kate Middleton's nausea probably means she'll restrict herself to a bland diet, otherwise known as England food.
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