The Colbert Report
No Nuclear Iran
Season 3 • 09/25/2007
In light of their recent ads, Stephen decides to forgive The New York Times.
Intro - 9/24/07The Colbert ReportS3
Iran's president speaks at an Ivy League university, Congress censures MoveOn.org and Stephen nails Thomas Friedman.
Thomas L. FriedmanThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen asks Thomas Friedman what it feels like to be a guy who's passionate about UPS.
The Metric SystemThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen's been railing against the metric system since he was a midday anchor in 1987.
The Word - Na Na-Na Na Na NaThe Colbert ReportS3
We owe a debt of gratitude to the Senate for reminding us that words can hurt.
Sign Off - Stephen Accepts Your ApologiesThe Colbert ReportS3
This year 1-888-OOPS-JEW shared the line with 1-888-MOPS-KEY, a consumer help line for finding the best prices on janitorial equipment.
Intro - 9/25/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen sits down with author John Grisham and learns that half of the world's languages are going extinct.
K. David HarrisonThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen asks K. David Harrison, author of "When Languages Die," if he's translating his book into any dying languages.
Tip/Wag - Muslim HipstersThe Colbert ReportS3
Thank you, Muslim hipsters -- by wearing ironic T-shirts, you make the TSA's job that much easier.
John GrishamThe Colbert ReportS3
John Grisham is taking a break from writing about lawyers. Now he's writing about pizzas.
Indecision 2008: Don't F%#k This Up America - GiulianiThe Colbert ReportS3
Dustin Hoffman and Rudy Giuliani have been at each other ever since Hoffman beat out the former mayor for the lead in "Tootsie."
No Nuclear IranThe Colbert ReportS3
The New York Times issues a mea culpa for giving MoveOn.org the "blame America" discount.
Intro - 9/26/07The Colbert ReportS3
Tonight, Stephen reports on NBC and iTunes, questions the validity of a third political party, and interviews Tony Bennett.
Forgiving BennettThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen couldn't stay mad at Tony Bennett after listening to his Emmy acceptance speech.
The Word - A Word From Our SponsorsThe Colbert ReportS3
With the new NBC Direct, you can't fast forward through the commercials -- you're that in control.
Canadian DollarThe Colbert ReportS3
Economists are saying that our first president, George Washington, is no better than Canada's first president, a duck.
Tony BennettThe Colbert ReportS3
Tony Bennett feels that celebrities have an obligation to speak up against injustice.
Sam WaterstonThe Colbert ReportS3
Sam Waterston invites viewers to go to Unity08.com to choose Stephen's presidential running mate.
The Word - Early ImmunizationThe Colbert ReportS3
If we offer our children things like healthcare now, who knows what other unrealistic things they'll expect?
Sign Off - Bear in the WoodsThe Colbert ReportS3
Isn't it smart to be as strong as a bear -- if there is a bear?
King TutThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen dreams of a world where we don't see people as black or white, but as gold or not gold.
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